Our Memories of Q
4/27/23
Mike Fallon
My friend Q never called me Mike. He sometimes answered the phone in later years as “Hello Mr. Chair!” with his emphatic expression. But usually he called me brother or family-and he *meant it.*
I first met him several years ago at the work event, he immediately was like you need to get involved in Young Dems. I demurred and gave some bipartisan dribble, but he was like “No, I know you are a Democrat” and and then gave his trademark belly laugh. He pushed me to get involved as he did for so many young people.
When I moved to Middletown, he immediately got me involved in his first state representative campaign. The 💯 campaign crew with his wife Carrissa, Devonna, Nick became my lifelong friends. We shared work, deep conversations, but mainly laughs and fun that continued long after the campaign was over.
I was Que’s body man in 2018 and spent the whole day running around with him. This was a man who truly was Middletown. There rarely was a voter he greeted who didn’t know him because they went to elementary school or his church or 18 other places.
He became of my greatest friends and mentors- who often told me that he was tougher on me because expected a lot from me. I wouldn’t be where I am today without Q and I won’t be the same without him. Q just elevated people that was his thing- he wanted to build people up.
He also constantly fighting for all people, fighting for progress, fighting for housing, fighting for justice. He was a moral voice, but also someone who just so fun to be around.
He was a friend to so many, but gave everyone the attention that made them feel like they were his only friend in the world.
I can’t believe you are gone friend, I will never forget you. Because I knew you, I have been changed for good. ❤️ 🖤
3/1/23
Kathy Flaherty
I first met Q at a Region 2 regional mental health board event at Middlesex Community College. Will never forget how his smile and his positive spirit lit up the room. When I explained what we do at Connecticut Legal Rights Project, he already knew because of the work of his mom. It was an absolute gift to be able to work with someone so very dedicated to his community. We continue the work in tribute to him.
2/23/23
Jasmine Taylor
I last chatted with Quentin at Cross Street’s Friends & Family Day service on November 20, 2022. I hugged him and Carrissa and shared the exciting news of my new job at Yale. He had asked me the 5Ws about my new role: Who, What, Where, When, and Why. He was always so proud of me and said, “great job, sis.” Over the years, I have always loved and respected Quentin, Queen, and Carrissa. Quentin had a bright personality, a big smile, and a sense of humor. Whether in-person, on Facebook, or on Instagram, he always encouraged me to get involved in the community! He’d even send me updates on his latest fraternity events to meet new people. I admired his drive, determination, and goals. I’m genuinely saddened to hear of his passing. I was excited to see him become President of the United States one day! Another fond memory was bumping into him and Carrissa at the airport. I admired their travel miles and felt inspired by their love for one another, and I hope I find that myself one day. As Samuel Johnson once said, “It matters not how a man dies, but how he lives.” Q, you will be missed today and always!
With love,
Jasmine
2/22/23
Donna Hylton
STEAM Train is forever grateful to Representative Quentin Williams him for his unwavering support and kindness. I remember when both he and Senator Matt Lesser approached me about getting state funding for our Fast Track program which offers free workforce development training to unemployed and underemployed individuals. At the time we were doing our best to offer IT training to the underserved in our community using funds from grants and individual donations. His advocacy and initiative made is possible for us to receive State funding and students have benefited greatly because of he cared enough to make a difference in their lives. Last year he enthusiastically hosted a virtual youth enrichment forum to inform parents about programs and opportunities available in our community, and I was honored to represent STEAM Train. Representative Quentin highlighted many amazing ways to enrich the lives of our children. His passion for his community was infectious. He will be missed, but never forgotten.
2/21/23
Faith M. Jackson, Director of Equal Opportunity & Diversity Management, City of Middletown, CT
Like Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., we lost a promising upcoming leader. Someone determined to change the world. That was Q. He was always ready for a great debate on subject matters that were dear and important to him and the people that he represented. Those without a voice. Q was full of life. A real character and certainly someone that made you smile. I always enjoyed conversing with him. Sometimes, we didn't see eye to eye, but one of us would end up saying to the other, I'll have to think about that. Q was always challenging you and then he would say, just do it. Let's get it done. He was always positive about things, because he believed that it could be done if we just worked hard to make it happen. He had a persona that was truly captivating in every way. My favorite remembrance of Q is him coming to United Way meetings all dressed up in a suit wearing flip flops and carrying his laptop. Always ready for business. He did have his own way of doing things. Our last meaningful conversation was in December 2022 about the Fair Rent Commission and the next step needed as someone who works with Landlords and Tenants in Middletown. I told Q that it was good that Towns are now required to have a Fair Rent Commission. However, I told him the next things that the State needs to do was to implement a Cap on how much Landlords could increase a tenant's rent, which have been absorbent forcing many to start looking for a more affordable rent. So, I guess the word got out and I am happy to see that Senator Gary Winfield is pushing a Bill forward to do just that. A tenant's rent should not increase more than their yearly raise and or salary increase, if they even get one. They should call this the Q Landlord Bill, because this was a subject that we discussed often and I believe that Q was instrumental in bringing it to fruition. I certainly will miss our lively debates and watching Q change the world for a better society for all. Q, was a bright and shining star, whose work will continue to light up change in the State of Connecticut. Warmest Regards.
2/3/23
Gene and Karen Nocera
It seems like a lifetime ago I have had the pleasure and honor working with Q. As his former principal at Bielefield School I welcomed him to our kindergarten ~ the rest is history.
I gave Q the principal’s award when he graduated from Bielefield Elementary School and it was so well deserved. I think of Q in this famous quote ~ If you want to serve your respective community focus on utilizing real leadership to better others' quality of life and put politics aside so your constituents can look up to you. Your legacy is what matters !
More than a title or leadership position.
Gene
I first met Q when he would come to our neighborhood and hung out with all the neighborhood kids. He was so much fun and so polite to all the parents.
I could tell them that Q was in a million.
I worked at Keigwin when Q was in the 6th grade.
I knew he was going places and changing his world and ours.
You will be forever in our hearts .
Karen
2/3/23
Kellin Atherton
Hey Q,
Sorry it's taken me a couple weeks to write you something. Sigrid got Covid, I got Covid, the kids were each sick for a couple of days, and I've been grieving some family that passed or are getting close to passing. January 2023 has been a lot, and losing you... I don't know, bruh, I just wanted to make sure I took the time to write you something real.
The first time we met I told you I lived in the Highlands and you replied "the Highlands? I didn't know they had white people there now!" and I replied, "they don't, it's just me and my family," which you loved and that was the first time I heard your laugh.
I feel selfish grieving you. On January 5th and for a few days after, people would ask what was wrong, and I would reply, "my friend died." But was I really? You were so caring and joyful for so many people - where is the line between acquaintance and colleague and mentor and friend and brother?
Then at your memorial, Brandon McGee turned to some of your frat brothers and said something along the lines of "Q made us all feel like we were so special, are any of us really special?" This so clearly captured the sentiment I've carried.
The best Middletown event I've ever attended was the Black Panther premier. Of course, the theater and the movie were great and your enthusiasm rolled over us all. But the lecture at First Church before is what I remember best. How this was so reflective of your beliefs and personality. It wasn't enough to experience something with others, you wanted us all to learn and practice critical thinking for the things we love to nerd out on.
Watching some of my own role models age over the last few years, having children and raising them here in Middletown, changing my career to fit my values, and working hard to improve our community already had me thinking about legacy. I'm getting bored and tired with some of this electoral and community work. I just want to chill with Sid and the kids.
Then, you were gone, and it had me thinking about our last conversation about the library. You were so passionate about so much of the work you did. I feel pretty confident I know what I'm passionate about now, and I don't know if that clarity of purpose would be there without you and that conversation.
There are other memories: game night at WFP, the Sunday service at Cross Street after the R's came at you with some nonsense and you spoke to the congregation, mac and cheese at your mom's house. I share the feeling with so many others that I want one more conversation to hear straight from you what you think our next move should be.
Your Middletown family is so strong, kind, smart, caring, and inspiring. I've told Matt, Sacha, Shanay, and others that I haven't really felt like leading lately. That I just want to follow and be their soldier. I'm sure there will be disagreements about policy or direction from time to time, but those all feel so small in this moment. If you and your family will have me as a friend, then I will play whatever part I can to continue one small piece of your work.
Peace and comfort your friends and family.
Kellin Atherton and family
2/2/23
Ann Faust
I came to know Quentin when I was the Executive Director of the Coalition on Housing and Homelessness. I was impressed at his knowledge of the homeless response system and his genuine interest in housing. He saw housing as a basic human right.
When one of his constituents was homeless, a young man of eighteen, he did everything he could to help. That was Q’s way. It didn’t matter if you were powerful or anonymous, rich or poor, if you were one of his constituents, he would do everything he could to help.
He helped the young man call 2-1-1 to find a place to stay for the night. He drove him to the shelter and stayed with him during the intake process. The intake did not go smoothly. The shelter was short staffed and short on patience, but Q would not leave till the young man had a place to rest his head. Quentin followed up with the young man for many months and did his very best to make sure he got the help he needed. Through this experience, Q learned how difficult the system can be and also how social services can turn a life around.
When the system wasn’t working for his constituent, he didn’t blame the front-line worker. He didn’t blame the individual organization. He blamed the system and he saw it has his job to change the system. He was so fired up after this experience that he met regularly with the LEAD group, a group of people who experienced homelessness in their lives and now advocate for change. Because of this process, he brought many great ideas for positive change to the legislature. His life was cut too short to see some of the changes come to fruition. It’s now our job to make it happen.
2/2/23
Dic Wheeler
Remembering Quentin Williams: 1/28/23
Good afternoon.
My name is Dic Wheeler and I am the Executive Artistic Director of Oddfellows Playhouse Youth Theater in Middletown.
We all miss Q. For some of us he has left a big hole, for others - Carrissa, Q’s mom, his closest friends - it must be a chasm that I can not even imagine.
Quentin was a tireless champion for the children of Middletown and a lifelong Oddfellow - as a child involved in Playhouse programs, a long-time Board Member, a friend, and an enthusiastic and impactful supporter of Oddfellows' work while serving in the State House.
And when I say Odd Fellow, I mean it in the best sense - unique, creative, compassionate, one who doesn’t fit into any simple mold.
Anyone who ever met Q, even briefly, will remember his positive spirit, his authentic and beautiful smile, and his commitment to making the world a better place.
Q delivered.
He delivered for his friends
He delivered for his constituents
He delivered for his family
He delivered for his community.
In the summer of 2018, when I had just returned to Oddfellows after years away, we held a “Love Oddfellows Day”, asking supporters and community members to come help clean the place up. It was a long, grubby, sweaty day. Both Q and Carrissa came. Several local politicians and candidates made an appearance and lent a hand for a bit, or just shook some hands. Q came early, stayed all day, lifted thousands of pounds of platforms and lighting instruments and whatever else was needed, smiled and laughed through it all, – and he brought donuts.
He delivered.
In the summer of 2021, when we were trying to get the Children’s Circus of Middletown on its feet during COVID, we desperately needed lots of covid tests. I called everywhere, from the Health Department to the United Way and Community Foundation - no one could come up with any. Then I called Q. Two hours later, he called back to say that 300 tests were on the way.
Q delivered.
If you needed him, he was there.
Since I’ve been back at Oddfellows, Q has always called me “Director”. Not because he didn’t know my name, but as a sign of respect.
Respect
Service.
Leadership
All with an amazing sense of joy on the journey
Right now my heart goes out to the loving family that Q left behind, who have to find a way in themselves to move forward without him. That is hard. Quentin I’m not as worried about. Whatever your beliefs about the afterlife, Q is going to be fine. He is somewhere now, shaking hands, flashing smiles, wearing bright and gaudy but somehow classy clothes, and asking what he can do to help. He is making someplace a better place to be.
Thanks Q, for making our place a better place to be.
(I shared this at Q’s Memorial in Bloomfield on January 28)
1/29/23
Matthew Graves
I met Quentin in first grade. Although it would be a surprise to anyone who met him later, Quentin was also in the Cub Scouts. Ever the best seller with fundraisers, he won a red A-frame tent as a fundraiser prize and went camping...for one night...and that was it. He gave me the tent and told me that he would 'absolutely never go camping another night in his life.' Although it sounds like he was dragged into a camper one night, he held true to never sleeping on the ground in a tent again. In fact, my wife Liz and I have lived in northern Minnesota for 12 years in a yurt, and we've extended the invite for Quentin to visit on multiple occasions. He was interested in making the trip, but couldn't get over the idea that we live too far in the woods with bears, moose, and wolves, and that it's too much like camping.
Rewinding back to middle school, Quentin had a similar personality to later in life--outgoing, welcoming, encouraging, upbeat, kind, social, and interested in others. I didn't often hang out with him outside of school, but he was such a friendly person to spend time with playing trumpet together from later elementary through high school (and sometimes messing with Mr. Gaylord), going to Hershey Park for a band competition, debating some of his ideas like "it's only illegal if you get caught", attending meetings and events for Honor Club, and meeting up when I returned to Connecticut to visit family from college and from living in Minnesota. When Liz met him he gave her 'one of the biggest hugs' she's even received from someone she just met, and she remembered that exuberant, accepting moment ever since.
Quentin and I have always be quite different with our interests and lifestyle, however, we've always had a similar view on life and an interest in what each other was up to. Quentin was always a friend who I could fall out of touch with for a year, then easily pick up where we left off with a comfortable, welcomed feeling. In my experience, that's a rarity.
Quentin was always one of the family. He referred to my siblings as "brother" and "sister", my parents as his parents ("mom Graves" and "dad Graves"). He would join us for some family picnics, our weddings, and we graciously accepted the invite to attend Quentin and Carrissa's wedding.
I'll be forever grateful that I grew up with and maintained contact with Quentin, and that he lived so fiercely in the time he had.
In the attached picture, in the back row, I'm the 4th, Damien is the 5th, and I think you can find Quentin.
1/28/23
Lida Ramírez
El mejor de los fundadores de la escuela Stamford Charter School SCSE
1/28/23
Carolyn Vermont
Q, I first met you about 20 years ago. I loved your infectious smile. You were always so warm and welcoming. I suspect that the ancestors opened their arms wide to embrace you when you crossed over. Your legacy will live on forever!
1/28/23
Lauren Koster
I met Q sometime around 2014·15 through the education advocacy community in Connecticut when I was living and working in New Haven as a public school teacher and advocate. To say Q immediately left an impression is an understatement—that smile, quick wit, electric energy. Shortly after being introduced, I attended an advocacy event, walked into the room, and immediately knew I was in his presence. He was persistently ebullient and larger than life and, yet, he remembered the finest of details about those whom he met. I felt honored that he even recognized me and knew my name.
Although I met him professionally, I soon had the great fortune of calling him my friend; when our friends José and Frances married, it was Q who had us all laughing the deepest laughs before, during, and after the ceremony—and feeling like we were having more fun than ought to be allowed. I have yet to understand why those with the broadest smiles, most compassion, largest hearts, greatest visions, deepest commitment, and widest impact are taken from us far too soon. Nary an ill word could ever be said about Q, and these aren't rose-colored grief glasses talking; he simply was a walking slice of heaven.
My heartfelt sympathy to Queen and Carrissa and all those who knew and loved him. May his memory be a guiding light for us all.
1/28/23
Nathaniel Caballeros
Mr Q used to come to watch us during recess at our school, and it was true, he had a unique fashion style. He used to come with a black Adidas coat that fell all the way down to him ankles. At every single moment he had that shining smile on his face. I'll always remember that smile.
1/26/23
Liz Hibino
I didn’t have the privilege of knowing Quentin as well as many people, but I knew him - and I’ll be forever grateful for that! I met Q through my good friends Kasie and PJ, and I will always remember just being immediately enthralled by his BIG, BIG personality. His big smile, big laugh, big hugs - the phrase “larger than life” definitely comes to mind! He was his own person and didn’t try to be anything else. He also immediately felt like a friend - so welcoming and comforting. I was excited to reconnect with Q many years later as I began to get involved in social justice work in Portland and started to learn about how active he was in politics and equity causes. I was so impressed and so proud of the work he was doing. When Q spoke at Portland’s 2021 Juneteenth celebration, he made an impact. I think everywhere he went, he made an impact. Now in hindsight, I feel that I took him for granted and always thought, “Oh I’ll get to spend more time with him later. I’ll get involved in some of these amazing causes he is working on.” All of a sudden that chance to get to collaborate more with him and bask in that beautiful smile was gone. The more people who share their memories and their experiences of Quentin, the more I realize how truly extraordinary he was. I always knew he was special - but now I can see, based on the ENORMOUS impact he had, he was actually a hero. Larger than life for sure and his legacy will live on. We are blessed to have known him, to have had our lives touched by him - even those who didn’t know him, because he cared about everyone and fought for the rights and dignity of everyone in this state. He had so much love to give and it doesn’t just stop. Even death is not a boundary for love. The love he put out, is reflected by everyone who has been touched by him, and it will continue to grow and make positive impacts. I’m so grateful to Q’s mama Queen for bringing this amazing person into the world. My heart is with Queen and Carrissa, PJ’s family and everyone who is mourning Q. May his memory be for a blessing.
1/20/23
Asa Williams
Quentin (Class of 2005) and I (2002) spent one year together at Bryant, his first and my senior. But in that time, I and many others saw the signs of something great in the making. Most notably, I remember him with Bryant’s Student Senate and Multicultural Student Union.
My standout memory happened late that year. It was “Q” who advised me of a Student Senate awards event concurrent with the athletics banquet. The evening of those events, he would actually shuttle me and my parents between them.
My heart goes out to his family, friends, and community. “Q” is loved and missed immensely.
[The picture is of Quentin and Carrissa at Bryant’s 2017 homecoming, about a month before they married.]
1/19/23
Brendan Kelly
When I first started working in Middletown, 5 or so years ago, Que was one the first people that I met. He & I, along with hundreds of others, had spent the day attending the Middlesex Chamber of Commerce career fair at the Red Lion hotel. The thing that brought us together was that for some reason neither of us were satisfied with spending the entire day at a hotel as we both opted to stay for the evening's festivities. No one enjoyed networking as much as he did of course. One of the night's events was a not very well attended trivia contest. While Que & I did our best at trivia we quickly turned it into a who could be the loudest contest. He had everyone laughing the whole time. Once everything was done I actually ended up on the winning team somehow. When the prize turned out to be a new set of headshots I was disappointed & asked "who in the hell wants headshots?" without thinking. Que's eyes quickly lit up & he exclaimed "I do!". It didn’t take me long to understand why. Que was going places & fresh head shots was just another very small but important part of his journey in public service. While I'm sure that photographic technology will never advance to the point of being able to actually capture the essence of someone so dynamic & kind as Que, I like to think they played a tiny part in propelling him to the beloved & impactful state representative he soon became. From that night on, he felt like an old friend. It always made my night when we'd see each other at an event & I looked forward to his last minute invite to his big fraternity party every year. It breaks my heart that we'll never get to see how far he would go in service of his wife, family, friends, community & constituents. I'll miss his booming laugh, hilarious stories & warm hugs the most though.
1/18/23
Mike Corbett
Q was the most kind, generous human I met during my time in Young Dems. Knowing him was to know joy. I'll never forget the time we were hanging out after a meeting at Yale. We had the best time, and my ride left me there. He so graciously let me stay at his place and even cooked me waffles for breakfast in the morning. That last time we hung out in 2015 seems like just yesterday. We sung karaoke all night long, and as always, had the most amazing time. Of course there's all the wonderful things he did as a State Rep. But I knew him back in the day, and the best part is that he didn't change one bit. That smile. That laugh. That man. I will miss him greatly.
Hard work pays off, dreams come true. Bad times don't last, but BAD GUYS do.
1/17/23
Anika Singh Lemar
So many people have shared their stories of Q's smile and optimism, I feel a little odd sharing this one. In April 2022, Q graciously took the time to speak at the Yale Law School to students interested in housing justice. He spoke on a panel entitled, Collateral Consequences: Advocating for Fair Chance in Housing and Lending. The other speakers were advocates -- from Louisiana, New Jersey, and Washington, D.C. -- who had also been working to break down barriers to housing and small business lending faced by people with previous involvement with the justice system.
The speakers from out-of-state were able to point to victories. Their fight was ongoing, of course, but they had recent successes from which they drew strength. Q was in the middle of the legislative session, his first term chairing the Housing Committee, and deep in the struggle. He wasn't particularly optimistic that day. He told us -- more than once -- how sick he had gotten of the word "but," how accustomed he had become to colleagues telling him how much they agreed that justice and health and housing and food access were important goals, BUT...some other thing. And he told us that he had stopped hearing whatever it was that someone said before the BUT. He told us that he had learned that all that those people really wanted to talk about, all they really cared about, was whatever came after the BUT...that some other thing.
The next day, Q texted me. He apologized for being bitter and cynical. I thanked him for being there and thanked him for his honesty. I am so glad that my students heard from him that the work is hard. I am glad that they heard from him that there will be people who fight common sense solutions, even when those solutions don't cost anybody anything, even when those common sense solutions will save lives.
Q might not have been his normal jovial self that day, but who he was that day was very much part of who he was: fighting, even when the fighting was hard.
1/17/23
Dwight & Keiffer Phipps
For our cousin Quentin,
Between our summers in Canada and our Christmas’ in Connecticut – we spent a lot of time during our younger years together.
Always full of energy and positivity – he would always bring an huge smile to any gathering or conversation!
His love for his family and hometown aways present in everything he did!
We’ve been so proud of who he’d grown into and all of his impressive accomplishments. We know he leaves a void in so many hearts.
We are still at a loss however, send our sincerest condenses to everyone he touched and influenced.
With Love,
1/17/23
Elizabeth Bobrick
Q convinced me to go see 'Get Out' with him, Sarah Steinfeld and Diana Martinez. I'd been reluctant because I heard it was a horror movie. I was so glad that I saw it. Afterwards, we went out for a beer. Q was incredibly open about how hard it was for him to watch, and why. I'd known Q for a while already -- we'd been on the board of Oddfellows Playhouse together -- and we'd had serious conversations, but not about ourselves. I was so moved and so impressed by his willingness to make himself vulnerable, especially when he spoke about having been in 'the sunken place,' as it was called in the movie.This is the memory that brings me to tears, of the quiet, serious Q, who coexisted absolutely genuinely with the exuberant, totally out there, 'Hey sister!' Q. Rest in peace, friend; and I wish peace for all who are grieving. It will take a while.
1/17/23
Matt Pugliese
I met Q back in 2008. I was working as the Managing Director at Oddfellows Playhouse and was on the hunt for new board members. When I first met Q - of course the first thing I noticed was his laugh. Then his smile. And then this huge personality that filled up the room. Like we were long time friends when we had just met. Q came on board and immediately changed the energy and enthusiasm in the board room. When I departed Oddfellows for new opportunities - I never lost touch with Q. We spoke regularly - and it was always "Hello Director!" when I answered his call. We both ran for State Representative for the first time in 2018. It was incredible to watch his growth as a leader over those ten years and to be in that journey together. And then when he was elected, he continued to grow, lead and change the world. In the last year, it was wonderful to get to work with him again in my new role as Director of the Community Investment Fund. Of course when I got the job, he was one of the first to call and say "Congratulations, Director!" I'll miss you, Q.
1/17/23
Brian Levin, Bryant University Student Senate President '05/'06
Quentin "Q" Williams, it was an honor to follow in your footsteps at Bryant, and even more to see you build on those humble beginning to a life of political service and community activism.
To hear the way your colleagues speak of your energy, optimism, and advocacy takes me back to those days of your mentorship and friendship. We were just young people trying to make a positive difference, we still are.
Your loss is our loss, but your impact lives on in so many, for always.
Rest easy, my friend. #quentinwilliams #bryantuniversity #bryantstudentgov
1/16/23
Steve Rocco
I met Q when he was Downtown Manager for Middletown, and he immediately makes everyone feel like a friend. I would see him from time to time at events and meetings, and he was always warm and welcoming. It turned out we shared the same birthday, so I used to joke with him that we were twins separated at birth. That obviously wasn't true because I'm ... much older!
1/16/23
Terra Volpe
I Believe in Magic Because of Q Williams
I don’t know how to start this because there are so many ways to. Which Q story do I tell? Which one will show his explosive love and dedication to those he served? Which one will express how he impacted me, as a human being, who had the great fortune of knowing him? I’ve settled on 2 and I hope to honor him in the way he deserves.
1. It takes a lot to make me mad, and if you have, you know who you are, and so does Q. Last legislative session, I was driving home from Hartford, and I was super pissed. I was definitely having a moment. And my car phone rang. It was Q. To this day, don’t know what he was calling about because as soon as he said “How ya doing, sister” I basically vented out everything that was going on and how I was feeling. Q was always a safe place and he was a vault, so talking to him was aways easy. During that conversation, I started crying. He just stayed on with me, validated and comforted me. I felt so much better after I talked to him. By the time I got home, although still mad, I was calm and centered because Q took the time to be with me and receive my stress, disappointment, and anger. The next morning my phone rang again. And once again, it was Q. He was calling to check on me. He just wanted to make sure I was ok. Q just wanted us all to be ok and he was always extending himself, to make sure of that. He was generous with his love and friendship, always.
2. This early in December 2022, I got a call from a friend who was contacting me about a family of 6 who lost their housing. For this, I’ll refer to them as The Smith Family. Because of housing laws and the conditions of their voucher, they were unable to secure housing even though there was a place that had been offered to them in a neighboring town. I reached out to several people to help with this issue, including Q. Q understood everything that needed to be understood about this situation as soon as I started to tell him. He asked me to send him a copy of their housing voucher, which I did, and he was off and running trying to resolve this issue for The Smith Family. Over the weekend, I spoke with him several times as he advised me on who to call and who to “yell” at. He really was so annoyed. With his help and the help of a few others, this family was able to secure temporary housing in less than a week and had a plan forward. A few days after that I was on my way to a Christmas party. As I pulled into the driveway my phone rang and it was Q. He was calling just to double check that this family was ok. I spoke to him for 20 minutes because talking to Q was always more fun and soul filling, than any party. We talked about what a mess the housing laws were. We talked about what needed to be done to fix it. All the things. Then I said I should go because I’d been sitting in the driveway as people were walking passed me heading into the party. And then he said he was going out too. I asked him what he was doing that night and THAT’S when he told me he was in Hawaii. The whole time he had been advocating for this family, he had been on vacation in Hawaii with his wife. Unbelievable, but it was Q, so it was very believable. He got back a few days later and because he was always amazing about follow up, I got another text, “How are the Smith’s doing?” I will never delete that text.
There are no stories that can truly capture the magnificence of Q. He was an experience. He wasn’t just someone you knew, he was someone that happened to you. His magical superpower wasn’t that he could fly, it was that during any conversation you had with him, he was able to make you feel like you were flying. He lifted us. And yes, he demanded we all be the best we could be so we could serve as many people as we could in our own silos of work. Maybe that’s why his passing is so incredibly hard for all of us who knew and loved him. He not only expected the best from us, but Q was the best of us. He was the person we all want to be. He was made of joy and love and just the right amount of rage. He was a perfect cup of coffee on a Monday morning. His energy poured into us. It electrified us all and pushed us forward with enthusiastic optimism. He somehow expanded our personal capacity and commitment to do better. He made us brave. He was magic.
There was so much promise in him. It was exciting to think of all he would accomplish and become. It was exciting to think of what leadership like his would push us to do. Q was always clearing the way for the impossible to be possible. It’s why his passing feels so impossible.
Q surrounded himself with fixers. So those of us grieving him are people who see problems and work toward fixing them. We are now facing the unfixable and it is beyond words to describe the helplessness and grief this has caused. Because how do you turn a star back on? I don’t know. None of us do. Lately I’ve been obsessed with the James Webb Telescope images so pls excuse me if this is cliché. The only slight bit of comfort I have comes from some of those images, specifically the stars. The stars that have guided people since the dawn of time. It can take hundreds and hundreds of years for the light of the furthest stars to reach us. Some of those stars burned out centuries ago, yet we are still receiving their warm gentle glow now. Like the brightest, furthest star, the impact of Q was powerful and expansive. Until the last breath I breathe, I will hold Q’s warm and gentle glow in my heart and I will allow it to guide me to be brave and loving and joyful. But for now, I’m just going to allow myself to grieve and be sad, because, like so many, I miss him so damn much. I always will.
1/15/23
Councilman Phil Pessina
I watched Q during his MHS years grow into a young man with an infectious smile and how his infectious smile effected his peers and others positively!
Meeting me one day as in my new role from a retired Deputy Chief of our Middletown Police Department to an elected Councilman, we talked about serving our community and what it takes to earn the trust of it. I told him simply to look beyond party’s affiliation, to how he could make his community better, by being a voice for those who felt they have no voice. To be kind and loving and dedicated to our City of Middletown; which Q did and apparently listen too!
I will always remember Meeting Q and his wife Carissa and knew this was a match made in Heaven!
“Grief Never Ends…But it changes. It’s a passage not a place to stay. Grief is not a sign of weakness, nor a lack of faith… It is the price of love!”
RIP Q
Councilman & Good Friend Phil Pessina
1/15/23
David Daye
I remember when he walked into the room with a loud voice that carried confidence as he smiled and vied for an INROADS internship. Q stood out from many of these young and energetic scholars. Q was placed in banking, and I was in insurance. Later on, I graduated from Uhart and Q from Byrant. We kept in touch over the years, and Q would always speak positively of Middletown. He loved his community; he even tried to convince me to move. He told me about all the things he was working on and I was surprised that he could balance so much.
Q introduced me to Carissa in 2016 or 17. Q was beaming and I could tell that she complemented him in every way. In 2019, I saw Q at a cookout in Middletown and he was wearing sandals and white socks. I said, "Q, you're more Jamaican than me." We laughed because of our shared heritage. Over the years we would text each other to find out how things were going. Also, we would find something "Jamaican" to celebrate. I'm going to miss him dearly.
1/14/23
Megan
I first met Q, when I was about 23 at my friend Sara’s annual Three Kings Day party. The moment I met him, I knew what a kind and selfless man he was. Over the years, we’d bump into eachother randomly and he always had the biggest smile and most amazing laugh each time we saw eachother. I was so fortunate enough to see him again about 1 month ago while I was working in Farmington. As always, he had me cracking up and his laugh filled our restaurants dining room . Q, was one of a kind, true inspiration, and role model. My deepest condolences to his wife, Carissa, family, and everyone who has had the pleasure to know him. His legacy will forever live on.
1/14/23
Natalia Rudiak
Q and I met and became friends through the Young Elected Officials Network. We met regular at convenings & other events as we shared a passion for making real, progressive social change. Marita Garrett, a fellow YEO and mayor, and I drove cross-country to go to his wedding in Las Vegas. We all walked through the fire to come through politics at our age, in our era. We had so much respect for each other's work, accomplishments, and the ability to find joy through the political madness.
I am Polish-American and speak Polish. I will never forget the first time I met Q and we started chatting about our backgrounds. He told me, "Czesc!" which means "Hello!" I was in awe. He spoke a few more words and told me he grew up around Polish-Americans and learned to speak some Polish. Every time I saw him thereafter he'd great me with "Czesc!" and a big hug and smile. He endeared him to me forever. I even told my family in Poland about him to illustrate the depth and beauty of the United States.
Quentin lit up every room.
It had been quite some time since we ta;led, and in August I received a kind reconnection email from him. We were supposed to catch up this Fall but life got busy, and complicated. I wish I could have spoken to him and absorbed his infectiously positive energy. I have been in mourning since the news. This is an immeasurable loss and from experience, I know it will take time to heal especially after this all of the public activity subsides. I am sending all the love and comfort I can to his family, friends, and colleagues through this extraordinarily difficult time.
1/14/23
Ryan Kelsey (Former Student)
I had “Q” as my Professor for a leadership class during my senior year at the University of Hartford. “Q” was simply the best professor I had during my time at Uhart. Kind, caring, personable, funny, and positive are just a few words that come to mind when thinking of “Q.” Not only did he want us to succeed in class but in every day life. He started every single class asking us (students) what was something that happened that was good since the last time we had our class the week prior. He cared about our well being and made sure that we all knew we were not just a name on an attendance sheet. I’m lucky to have had the chance to learn from “Q” and know that the lessons he taught me during class will stay with me forever.
1/14/23
Jennifer Cashin
I met Q the week of orientation our freshmen year at Bryant. It was impossible to not immediately love this man, as his approach to life was filled with such enthusiasm, hopefulness and just love for everything the world has to offer. He was one of my best friends our entire college career. There was no way to be unhappy around Q. His presence brought joy to everyone, and all it took was one Q smile to entirely change the mood in a room. I could easily write a novel on how wonderful this man was, but I'm sure everyone else will cover that with better writing style than I could accomplish, so I will share two of my favorite memories of Q.
The first was when we had a trip to Canada. While everyone else was out at the bars, Q and I walked everywhere in the city to find some little comic shop that he had heard about. This is the level of nerd both of us were - books over bars! His excitement upon walking in the door of the shop made the miles walked absolutely worth it. The second was when my favorite comedian, Stephen Lynch, came to Bryant to do a show. Q and I went together, so I got to hear Q's amazing laugh frequently that evening. At one point, Stephen Lynch asked the audience to name a potential super hero. Knowing how incredibly awkward I feel with any type of attention given, Q yelled out my name - JENNY (he was the only person in the world I've ever allowed to call me that)! Stephen Lynch started laughing hysterically at the response to his prompt, made a few jokes, and then played a song about a superhero named Jenny. Despite how red my face must have been, and how I would have sunk into the chair or ran out of the room if anyone else in the world had done that to me, having Q there made even my awkward self comfortable in the situation.
Q was an amazing light in this world. I hope all of us can find some way to honor him and make a larger impact on the world to make up for his life being taken so soon. He had already accomplished more in his 39 years than most people do in 100, but I can only guess how much more he had to do in this world. Everytime I feel like I just can't do anymore, I'll remember Q and I'll take that next step.
1/14/23
Nitza
I met Mr. Q at a conference where I was presenting. He came into my breakout room and asked many Gard questions about racial equity. After he called our work and asked if we would be willing to offer professional learning for the families at his school. One of the nights we were doing a family night and my children also attended with a babysitter. Suddenly my son tells that my 2 year old daughter was nowhere to be found… I do not how Mr. Q knew but he ran out of gym and called the custodian and they both starting looking for her. We were panicking and he is looking for with a smile trying to keep me calm. I walked to another part of the school and he walked towards the front and he found her on the stairs leading to the first floor. He brought her to me and said that everything was fine. His smiled calmed all of us!
I was impressed at how he truly cared for all of the families at his school. He always reminded me that every workshop needed to be in Spanish and English!
1/14/23
Brian Dawson
Q and I changed our last names right around the same time- something not terribly common for men in their 30s. Like any bureaucratic process, it could be slow and frustrating, so Q being one of the loudest cheerleaders I had for that decision helped a lot along the way. Each time I would enter a room, or even his sight, his voice would boom my new name across it, catching every ear along the way in the manner only he could command. These exclamations embraced and socialized the change, just like he had welcomed me into many spaces before: the intimidating rope line when I was a fresh lobbyist and he was seasoned, a now-closed dive in his hometown at my first Young Dems meeting, or any other venue where Q could share some of his good will to make another person feel at home.
1/13/23
The Community Foundation of Middlesex County
The Board of Directors and staff of CFMC are deeply saddened by the death of Q Williams. We extend our condolences to family, friends, and colleagues in Middletown and throughout Connecticut who were positively impacted by his life, his work, and his commitment to community. We were honored to count him as a “community resource,” a person who was always happy and willing to provide insights and to brainstorm solutions. As a founding member of CFMC’s 365 Fund giving circle, Q believed that together, we can – and do – make a positive difference in our community, working to ensure a better today and brighter tomorrow for everyone. Q made an extraordinary impact on those around him and his light, leadership, and passion will continue to guide us all forward.
1/13/23
Edward Ford Jr.
Q and I would meet up often at different local restaurants in town. We would catch up and talk about all the latest developments in our lives. I would look to him for guidance and he always had a way of keeping it real with me. I’ll never forget a particular day, when we met up at Athenian Diner on Washington Street in Middletown. I was debating which Masters degree to pursue. My top two choices were either a Masters of Divinity or an MSW. Q looked at me and shared how one of his mentors had steered him straight as he was discovering his path, and that he was going to do the same for me. He knew my passion for scripture, theology, and serving as a minister and public servant. He knew I cared about the intersection of faith/faith based communities and the public square. He encouraged me to go for my MDiv. Q had a special gift that allowed him to point out the gifts that others around him possessed and encouraged them to train and activate those gifts further. He said to me “you have a way of presenting scripture in the public sphere in a way I think is unique.” His words stuck with me and still do till this day as I am pursuing my MDiv at Yale. He believed in me as he believed in so many other young people in his sphere of influence. I’m blessed to have known him as not only a mentor but a brother and friend.
1/13/23
Susan Bysiewicz
I have had the incredible privilege of knowing and working closely with Q Williams, a lifelong resident of Middletown, for nearly two decades.
Q loved Middletown – he lived and breathed it. Q was the product of Middletown Public Schools. He understood the power of education and become a passionate advocate for it. He was a bright light from the beginning. As a fifth grader in Bielefield School, he was recognized as a student of the year and always thought of himself as a Bielefield Bobcat. He went onto shine as a star student at both Woodrow Wilson Middle School and Middletown High School. After attending Bryant University, Q came back to Middletown and was very involved in our community. He served as City Treasurer, was active at Cross Street Church and served as the Director of Middletown’s Downtown District. He lived for our city’s Main Street, and our thriving downtown led him to create the Main Street Working Group in our Connecticut legislature.
When the state representative seat for the 100th House District became open, I was thrilled that Q wanted to represent our city in the state legislature. I knew he would excel in this role because he loved Middletown, our Main Street, our schools, and our people. He served his district joyously and authentically. Helping people was his calling. He loved his colleagues at the legislature, and they loved him back.
Q absolutely adored his mother, Queen Williams. As a single mom, she worked hard and sacrificed to raise him to be the amazing man he became. Just recently, Q changed his last name to Williams to honor his mother because he believed in the power of uplifting women. He knew that empowering women would uplift our families, our communities, and our state.
Q loved his beautiful wife, Carrissa. I still remember how they both shown on their wedding day, with Q in his white suit and Carrissa in her gorgeous white dress. Q was devoted to his wife Carrissa, who like him dedicated her life to helping others. When they bought their home on Bretton Road, Q was excited to tell me that Dr. Martin Luther King had stayed in his home. I was so sad to learn that both Q and Dr. King were both taken from us too soon at the age of 39.
Q understood that he was a role model and trailblazer as the first legislator of color elected the serve Middletown in the General Assembly. He loved visiting schools, especially Middletown High School, to talk about what he did in the legislature. He wanted Middletown students, especially those of color, to envision themselves as leaders.
Q was someone you wanted to be around, always exuding positivity and joy. His dazzling smile would light up a room, and his optimism was infectious. He will be missed not only by the people of Middletown and all of his colleagues in the Connecticut General Assembly, but also by leaders beyond the borders of our state.
So while we are all devastated and heartbroken by this loss, we must ask ourselves how we can best honor and carry on Q’s legacy. I believe we can do that in three important ways.
First, we should follow his lead and encourage women, particularly women of color, to run for office. Ask smart, competent women to run – the good news is that they are all around us. They are coaching youth teams, running PTA’s, raising money for charity and heading households. We should knock on doors, make calls and give money to candidates that we believe in, just like Q did. And we should support organizations that help women run for office.
Second, as elected leaders and involved community members, we must understand that we are role models for future leaders. Young people are watching what we do and listening to what we say. We should mentor young people, ask them to intern in our offices, and help recruit them to work on our campaigns. It is our duty to help them get involved. Q was always about the future and nurturing the next generation of leaders.
Finally, we should be there for each other just as Q was always there for each of us. He was the first to congratulate us on our successes and provide compassion when something didn’t go the way we hoped. He made everyone feel that they were his friend, and most of the time, they were.
Together, let’s promise Q that we will continue his legacy by looking forward and fighting for a more just and equitable future for everyone in our beautiful state. There will never be another Q, and we will miss him for the rest of our days. But, he will live on in each of us if we choose to continue his work.
1/12/23
Meredith Sheehan
I met Q my first night at Bryant, our freshman year. He was well known at school but he was always “our Q”. When we were seniors my cousin was a freshman but according to Q she was his lil cuz too! He wasn’t just a friend he was family. After college whenever we had a birthday or wedding among our group of friends, Q would always be there! One year he even showed up at a bar in Boston with his massive red suit case ready to celebrate. We always had a good laugh when we got together I mean how could you not with Q. His amazing smile, loving personality and unforgettable laugh he was the best friend anyone could ask for. We hadn’t seen each other in a few years but I’m so glad he had recently reached out last month in our friends group text.
I truly regret never thanking him for being the kindest person I have ever met. I’ll never forget him and what he meant to me. <3
1/12/23
Dineille Villaroel
Hello Beutiful. I only knew him at a couple INROADS events but he was a memorable soul! From the INROADS family: we are super proud of his legacy. PSALM 34
1/12/23
Damian
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1/12/23
Erica Hunter
I've had the privilege of knowing Q for quite a few years, well over 20. But our friendship nurtured between church and marching together. Q was a giant! There is no doubt in my mind that he was destined for greater. Q was covered by God's grace and he used his platform to help the less fortunate. He was a true disciple and wonderful leader. God chose him to be not only a vessel good but to be a light to the nation. I'm honored to have shared moments and words with him. He will be truly missed. He was the ultimate General.
1/12/23
Cara Kostacopoulos
I first met Q when I was a freshman at MHS and he was a senior. We were introduced by a friend of mine who was running cross country with Q. She came up to me and said Quentin Phipps wants to meet you and all I could think is why would this senior boy want to be introduced to a freshman girl. So I went along, somewhat skeptical, and met Q. When she introduced us, Q looked me straight in the eye and said "HI Cara, it's nice to meet you. I'm now your big brother so from here on out and if anyone messes with you, they mess with me." Now I was very confused, but Q went on to explain that his mom and my dad had worked together for years, and when he told me who is mom was it started to make sense. Apparently, my dad had been talking to Queen about being worried about me, his oldest child, starting high school. Queen took it upon herself to tell Q to keep an eye out for me and as Q told me that day he always did what his mom told him to. From that day on, Q was the perfect definition of a big brother. I'm still not sure I really wanted a big brother as it came along with requesting applications from potential boyfriends or questioning any boy he saw me talking to that he didn't know, but it also came with a constant friend, someone to talk to, and someone to have fun and laugh with. Q always made me laugh, even on my worst days, seeing his smile and hearing his laugh I couldn't help but join in. He became part of my family, showing up unannounced at my parents house for dinner, or calling to check in on my sisters, who naturally he considered his sisters too. Of course, as any good big brother would do, he also called to lecture me if he heard of any "shenanigans" I had gotten myself into, and somehow he heard about them all. When I went off to college, Q would come visit, sometimes with his PC boys, sometimes just him, but he made a point to stay in touch and make sure he met my new friends to make sure he approved. Q was the best big brother I never knew I wanted or needed until I had him, and I will never forget all the things he did for me, how much he taught me, and how much he loved the people in his very large circle. He truly defines what it means to be a good person and I will keep that with me and try to make him proud of me by using his example. Our world, our state, our town, our families and friends, and myself have suffered a huge loss that can never be replaced, but if we all live our lives thinking "what would Q do" together we can carry on his legacy. I love you Q, SIP.
1/12/23
Marie
Rest In peace beautiful soul! I remember the first time I met Q in Middletown through a friend, he asked me if I was special like him. Yes you were special and too special too good for earth. My sincere condolences to his family and wife.
1/12/23
Jacquelyn Santiago Nazario
I’ll always appreciate your advice & contacts for getting my baby, Charlie acclimated to Pittsburgh in their first year at Carnegie Mellon University. Your conversations on helping my baby navigate ADHD and channeling all that energy was always enjoyable.
I’ll always admire your passion & commitment to affordable housing, education, & a more peaceful community.
1/12/23
Lorenzo Marshall Sr.
"MIND over Matter" , since his time at Middletown High and even before, "Q' never let circumstances or obstacles deter him from striving to reach his goals and objectives. Always with the mindset of being a vessel to bring about positive change and Impact for others in need! Many thanks for stepping up and providing support and funding to assist the youth of Middletown, and pave the way for more opportunities for all!!!! Job Well done my friend!! As in your favorite sport of Track and Field, the baton will be passed , and your mission and objectives will continue to completion!! Never forgotten, R.I.P. and Glory, Quentin Soldier Williams!!!
1/12/23
Lauren Clifford
QUINTESSENTIALLY Q
Elegy for CT State Representative, Hon. Quentin “Q” Williams
Composed By: Lauren Clifford of Newtown, CT (Bryant University, Class of '05)
In Smithfield, Rhode Island, in 2001,
The Bryant dorms opened in warm August sun.
With luggage tags boasting a medley of states,
We freshmen had suitcases, duffels, and crates--
Compartments that held our potential and grit,
And tranches of fear, (we weren’t keen to admit),
But gumption was dogged, and high hopes won out--
Ideas for our futures were starting to sprout.
I went to the bookstore to buy some supplies.
The textbooks were bulky, I misjudged their size.
They wouldn’t all fit in the bag that I had--
A common mistake for a new undergrad.
A boy saw my plight, saying, “Pass those to me.
I know that they’re heavy, I bought the same three.
My bookbag is empty, let me carry some.
I’m Q from Connecticut. Where are you from?”
His smile was brilliantly bright and sublime,
The kind that brings joy in the saddest of times.
His positive energy oozed with each move--
Contagiously prompting my mood to improve,
“I’m Lauren,” I said, and then told him that I
Was also raised under Connecticut’s sky.
And after I thanked him, we started to walk
Across to the food court to finish our talk.
We spoke of our interests, our hometowns, our dreams,
Our new MP3s and our favorite sports teams.
Comparing our classes, we had overlap,
And planned social outings to fill in the gaps.
His laugh was like magic; his wit, razor-sharp;
His attitude signaled that he didn’t harp
On negative outcomes, and listening, I knew
These qualities were quintessentially Q.
A few weeks went by, we got into routines,
Attending our classes and meeting with deans,
Establishing friendships and clubs to enjoy,
And learning which dining hall foods to avoid.
We cheered on our Bulldogs to win football games,
And walked to Parente’s in torrents of rain.
Though drenched since we had no umbrella to share,
Our youth was upon us, we didn’t much care.
We’d just found our footings among program groups,
And then in a flash, we were knocked for a loop....
Professors were told to turn on their TVs,
We listened to broadcasters’ grim journalese.
We watched as the second plane’s target was hit
Which caused “The Before and The After” world split.
We screamed and we cried as the towers collapsed--
The time for our youthhood had fully elapsed.
Confusion and chaos expressly ensued--
A bunch of us searched for a landline to use
To check on our families who may have been caught
In remnants produced by Bin Laden’s cruel plot.
I gasped, as my panic continued to form,
“I left my prepaid calling card in the dorm!”
And just like a manna from heaven, divine,
Q stated, “Don’t worry, I got you. Use mine.”
I hugged him and thanked him, then I placed my call,
While he would inquire about protocol.
His kindness consoled me, my mind was at peace
For knowing my family was safe gave relief.
And when I got back to the dorm, there he was,
Providing a shoulder to cry on because
He wanted to comfort, and help if he could--
So selfless and willing to always do good.
His tenderness, warmth, and assurance came through--
Compassion that was quintessentially Q.
And after that trauma, the bubble had burst--
Most students were saddened and feeling their worst.
The gumption and grit had both started to fade,
But still we pushed on to receive decent grades.
If Q was dejected, it never did show--
His unbounded energy never did slow.
His ethos was strong, and his faith was unmatched;
His spirit not broken, just mildly scratched.
He looked to the future with vision anew--
That hopefulness was quintessentially Q.
When we were in class, I saw talent first-hand--
He spoke with charisma, he had such command
And presence when using his adamant voice,
I polled for School Senate and Q was my choice.
His force never weakened; his destiny, clear;
He’d go on to join the political sphere
Becoming a rep in his hometown to fight
The social injustice by making it right.
His tally of victories steadily grew--
That leadership was quintessentially Q.
And Shakespeare reminds us, a rose smells the same,
For even if called by a different name,
Its traits remain constant, its value is fixed,
From start point to end point and all points betwixt--
Called Phipps or called Williams, or Quentin or Q,
His virtuous character always stayed true.
And now here we are where the ink hasn’t dried,
Against “The Before and the After Q” line,
Just over the threshold where grief has commenced,
Where memories, nostalgia, and tributes condense.
We’ll always remember his wonderful laugh,
His smile, uplifting, in each photograph.
His great optimism, his purpose and worth,
His love that transcended his time here on earth.
Our hearts lead the way, giving thanks that we knew
That bright light that was
Unmistakably,
Undeniably,
“Quentin”-sentially
Q.
1/11/23
Dawn Huckelbridge
Q was a bright and beautiful light from my earliest memories of him -- dancing on a bus, face lit up, laughing, spreading kindness and joy everywhere around him. But I also remember one year at a conference sitting and talking to him while he was going through a challenging period. Months later when I too was going through a hard time, he told me how much it meant to him and his path that I sat and talked with him, and that he would forever do the same for me. I remember being stunned, crying. He said it with such kindness and that is who he was. Genuine, kind, the kind of person who effortlessly made real and special connections with everyone around him. I will try to carry that light, and to remember to take the time to connect with more people in the same way. My heart goes out to his family and community, and the many people he touched. Love you, Q.
1/11/23
Russ Overton
It was my pleasure meeting Q this past July and spending three weeks with him at the State and Local Program at Harvard Kennedy School. Q was passionate about government and had a smile that would light up the room. I am forever grateful to have met him. He was taken too soon and I’m reminded of this quote by Edward Stieglitz that sums Q up to me “And in the end it's not the years in your life that count; it's the life in your years.”
1/11/23
Sarah Ganong
One of the things that's striking about hearing so many memories of Q over recent days is how similar they all sound. We're all talking about Q's smile and laugh and warmth, sure. But we're all also talking about what a great friend he was, and cheerleader, and how he celebrated our leadership or recommended opportunities, or complimented our outfits. Q had an ability, unique among anyone I've ever met, to make people feel confident and comfortable in his presence. When we hung out, Q made me feel like I could do anything, whether it was beat him at a board game (ha) or win any election or pass any policy. Q was himself with everyone, and as evidenced by this book everyone misses him. Thanks for your friendship and lessons, Q. We won't forget them.
1/11/23
Lorie Warzecha
Dear Queen and Clarissa, Q has been in our lives since kindergarten, meeting Amy to take her off bus daily in grade school, Boy Scouts with Adam and just hanging around! Queen we worked together at CVH, and our children grew up together and graduated. Queen you were truly blessed having that light shine on all our lives, he learned all that love to give from you! Clarissa I remember the day Q told me all about the special lady named Clarissa that is in his life and how much he loved you! Q was so happy and told me he was going to propose marriage! What a smile and I’ll never forget his love for you!❤️and Queen❤️ !
1/11/23
Linda Butts Brooks Miller
Quentin got me interested in Marvel’s “Black Panther”. He was so excited about bringing the movie to the Middletown community, dubbing the event “Wakanda to Middletown: A Black Panther Movie Premiere”. At the premiere he was dressed in African garb, beaming that bright, welcoming smile as he excitedly explained to the audience how groundbreaking this movie was and that it was a childhood dream come true. He, as part of the Middletown Racial Justice Coalition, galvanized the community around this epic movie by surprisingly selling out 2 Metro Movies theaters. I will never forget Quentin’s exuberance, not just about Black Panther the movie but about all social justice causes. He was a true ally and advocate for unheard and marginalized voices. He will be so missed as he was a rising star in Middletown, the state of Connecticut and beyond. His spirit and good works are eternal and live on!
1/11/23
Chris Harrington
When I moved to Connecticut, it was the first time in my adult life that I lived that far away from family and everything familiar. After moving, I realized that I was far more scared of failing than I initially thought. Imposter syndrome was real, and I swore that I was going to be sent home as soon as people realized that I wasn’t as smart or capable as they thought.
As a result, I was shy, reserved, and extremely cautious with everyone that I met. All of that ended the day that I met Q. I remember him telling me a hilarious story about how he almost got jumped by various members of Dipset while wearing one of his signature suits. The way he told the story made me laugh almost to the point of tears. It had been the first time that I let loose since I moved.
Since that moment there was always something that gravitated me toward Q. I would often work in the cafeteria at the capital and every time he came in, I would smile. He would always stop at the table that I was at, and we would “work” side by side. I put work in quotations because there were plenty of breaks involving us talking about our lives and laughing so loud that we turned heads.
Q always showed so much love. I don’t know if he knew how much his words kept me going. After leaving CT, we didn’t keep in touch as much, but every time we spoke, he would always say how much he enjoyed working with me. His words always brightened my day. It was as though he knew that I struggled with confidence and knew exactly what to say.
Q inspired all of us to grab life by the horns. He laughed fully, he loved completely, and he served his community with a level of honor and zeal that most never realize.
To his family, particularly his wife Carrissa and his mother Queen, I am so incredibly sorry for your loss. Q was a giant, not just because of all the amazing things that he was able to accomplish, but because he was a good man with a pure heart. As I mourn him, I am also so thankful for his life. For me, he restored my faith that good humble people who are committed to justice can make extraordinary change. Whenever I lose hope in government or get upset with the status quo, I will think of Q and remind myself that extraordinary things are possible. We just have to believe.
Q- Thank you for your life. You will continue to inspire as you have always done.
1/11/23
Lisa Hammersley
Q was one of my favorite legislators up at the LOB. Every time I saw him he had the largest smile on his face and his backpack on his back. He was a passionate advocate who lived to make our state more equitable and just. I will miss receiving his phone calls to plot how to increase equity in the state's education space. Q was loved by all and his impact spanned across so many across the state.
1/11/23
Marta Collazo
I was assigned to work with Rep. Williams as his HDO Press Aide shortly after he got elected and were already planning for the work ahead this legislative session. He was always professional, reasonable and kind. My favorite text from him was "Approved" after sending him a draft for review. I admired his commitment to his constituents and his dedication to all who needed his help or support. His broad, happy and sincere smile will be missed by all of us. My sincerest condolences to his wife, mother and all who loved him. I will forever remember him and the great honor of working together. MCR
1/11/23
Marta Mierny
I was fortunate to meet Quentin when I started dating my husband, Kris Mierny, 18 years ago. I was introduced to Quentin as Kris and Damian’s brother. From that moment on, he embraced me as family, called me his sister, and he would later become “Uncle Q” to our daughter, Nina. My favorite memory is dancing with Q to one of my favorite songs being played by one of my favorite bands. His energy was magical, his smile was radiant, and his moves were so boss! From the moment Q met Nina, he was proud of her and intrigued by her intelligence, and he pushed my husband and me to make sure she received a great education. Q, I loved the relationship you had with my brother in law, Damian and your brothers. I loved seeing how in love you were with Carrissa. I loved how proud you were to be Queen’s son. I loved how much you loved our town. I loved seeing you at family gatherings and all the Middletown events. Your energy was infectious. Your passion and love will never be forgotten.
1/10/23
Beth Emery
Q……..
Commissioner Emery (as you always addressed me, even when I no longer served) will always be thankful for and remember the times we shared on P&Z, as well as heartfelt conversations we had over time; thankful for your presence, perseverance, and ability to see the possibilities in people, and problems—needing to be solved. I am especially grateful for your example in following your passions, by pushing boundaries and never taking a no for an answer. With a glint in your eye, you repeatedly found a workaround, didn't you? Always with a generous smile, infectious laughter, and outstanding style! Not just striving, always thriving even in the tough times. Your life on earth, was cut to short. Your star will always shine brilliantly in my memory! You will be missed! Rest in Peace*
1/10/23
Bill Welz
How did he have so much time?
That's the thought I often had about Q. We all know and loved him and somehow, in a few years in the legislature, he managed to leave a lasting memory on everyone he met. He greeted me as family and was not quick to talk legislative business. He was in the business of building real relationships by sharing life stories and finding out what connects us.
I think we both used laughter as a coping mechanism to get through a hard discussion and to figure out a plan to do something about it. I once closed his office door mid meeting because we were laughing so hard, and he said "oh now you are shutting MY door" and he burst into tears laughing.
I read through everyone's stories today and it's no surprise that so many of you had the same experience, which always had me question how he had the time to spend so much of it with all of us in such an impactful and personal way. My take is Q knew time was important and fleeting and he chose to treat every interaction as a meaningful connection, and the real work was knowing each other; where we come from, and what shaped us, and then, and only then, could the legislative work commence.
He had high aspirations for himself and we all had high hopes for him. It's a devasting loss for the State of Connecticut, but maybe we can all spend a little more time getting to know each other, just like Q did.
1/10/23
Adam Hayn
Hey old friend, I’m sorry we didn’t have more time together. I know we had a lot of fond memories growing up. We also had our falling out, and I’m sorry for that. I’m sorry we didn’t have the chance to make it right. You were always a good friend growing up and became a good man, and you always did you right thing…certainly the reason why you were loved by so many. I know you had a lot more to offer this world. Hopefully they know how to re-create my mother’s cookies up there, because she’s not there, yet, in case you were looking for them. Rest in peace, buddy. See you again, someday.
1/10/23
Sherri Condon
I met Q around mid to late 2006. I remember saying to him that I got his flyer and wanted to know what he was about. He stated "vote for me"! We talked about what he wanted for Middletown and I was hooked since! He has been someone I looked forward to seeing and talking to since that day!
1/10/23
Claire Cote
Years ago, I had the opportunity to go to the Poconos with Q, Alison and one of his PC Brothers Damian. I have such a fond memory of one day going for a hike as a group- not something that was a regular activity for Q at all. He was so excited though for that, and the other adventures that weekend that included paintball and horseback riding! He had brought this incredibly LOUD (bright red and bright yellow- we're talking like a walking McDonalds logo-bright) matching sweatsuit for the fun. He proudly puffed his chest out and took big ol' strides walking through the woods that day with a big smile on his face exclaiming "I'm hikin'!" He was always such a good sport ❤️💛
Q and I stayed in touch throughout the years and our paths crossed in the aging/advocacy world and even at the Middletown Mayor's ball once. I always welcomed a friendly text saying "Hey Sis" and an invite to his annual Kentucky Derby events.
1/10/23
Dollie Price. dpvlp6241@gmail.com
Quentin "Q" Williams is the son of my best friend, Queen Esther Williams. It hurt me terribly when I heard of the news. Quentin will never be forgotten in my eyesight. He had a career which he would have made it to the top. In my sight, he made it to the top. One of the best young men in his field. You will be truly missed Quentin. Truly Rest in Peace.
1/10/23
Stephanie
Quentin and I went to school together from elementary all the way to high school. He was a year behind me but we had so so so many interactions throughout the years. He was always there to listen, to laugh, to joke, to just... be. My father died when I was a senior in high school. As soon as he heard the news he reached out to not only myself but my brother as well and continue to check in on us when there were difficult days ahead such as graduating without my father there. He still, as we became adults, made sure to keep in contact and still had the must selfless heart. Q would even take time out of his busy work day to meet with his teacher friends and their classes when visiting the capital. To have more people like Q would be to make this world the best it possibly could be. We love you and will miss you so so so much.
1/10/23
Erica Matulis
Context: The 1st time I met Q was at PJ'S and Kasey's wedding as a teenager and I hadn't seen him until many years later at CTCon, we didnt recognize eachother till later into the conversation to which he said - "Oh! We are family!" Of course PJ and him are basically brothers which makes us family but he treated me as family having no real knowledge of who I was as a person. To simply 'see' someone as they are, accept and treat them as your own as he did, is something that we all need to do a little more of.
1/10/23
Jen Kleindienst
I first met Q about 6 or 7 years ago playing board games. He was so much fun to play with (even though our venn diagram of games was pretty narrow), and competitive in a way that just made you laugh and tease him. I loved Q's curiosity and kindness, and was so excited when he ran for office. Even though he didn't represent my part of Middletown, we talked a few times about environmental issues and particular bills and he was so respectful and dedicated to serving Middletown residents. It's hard to believe I won't get to hear his booming laugh or electric smile again - but both will live on in my mind and heart.
1/10/23
Jonathan Hogan
Mr. Williams was someone I wish I got to know better. My family and I owe him so much! He helped us find a path forward to bring home our youngest from foster care in Arizona. Every day I get to spend with my family as big and complete as it is is thanks to the efforts of Q. I will never forget the kindness he showed.
The moment we reached out to him, he was asking questions about our situation. He wanted to know who we were and how he could help. He cleared the way for us to get special permission to move on to the next phase of the adoption process.
We had found out about our youngest child through my family, a baby from a cousin who needed a loving home. After a brief discussion, we knew would be that home for him. Shortly after this discussion, we started the adoption process.
Anyone familiar with the child welfare system in the US knows it can be difficult and slow moving. It took us about 6 months to get physical custody of our son, a process that was complicated by state borders and a global pandemic.
Our permission to get him was on hold because of Covid-19, which was a reasonable precaution. We developed a plan to drive cross country in an RV, which would minimize contact with other people while we got him.
To get the permission to do this, we told Q what our plan was. He loved it and our story and helped us get the permission we needed. In May of 2020, off we went on to get our baby. This would not have been possible without Q.
Thank you Mr. Williams, you were an integral part of completing our family. You cared and made it known to call you anytime we needed you. I regret not sending you updates about how everything went. Our youngest is officially adopted by us and we are so happy and blessed to have him.
1/10/23
Kelly Osterling
I met Q in middle school we were both at a science camp at CCMC. I was shy and quiet and Q was in my group, and you can guess… he took me under his wing and made come out of my shell. “Let’s go girl you’re hanging out with me” he said. I will never forget how he made me feel in that situation and really made my experience so much better than it would have been had I not met him. He was so genuine and just wanted everyone around him to have a good time. I went to school in Plainville and was a cheerleader so at football or basketball games we always tried to find each other to catch up. The other day my mom made a comment to me how he would always find her in the stands to say hello to her as well. She said “he was just a genuine, kind and respectful guy”. When I moved to Cromwell we would see each other out (pic attached is when I saw him at Rookies once; 2010) I remember telling him I was so proud to see his success from afar/online and we joked one day he would be mayor of Middletown. He said “do I have your vote” and I said well if I could I would vote for him. Loved following him during his elections Just loved following him in general and see the amazing things he was doing. Just felt so proud of him and his accomplishments.
Saturday night we were in an Uber and we were talking about how we wished we could have made it to the green the night before and the Uber driver said “oh you knew Q I did too I was there last night” she had worked out with him in the morning at the gym and after we talked about him for a few minutes I couldn’t help but think - we should all live more like Q! His kindness, genuine, a friend to everyone, larger than life personality that you really can’t put into words…and always with a smile! This world would be a better place with more people like him.
Reading peoples posts online and chatting with the driver has really moved me, just hearing how many people have these stories about him and how many people he touched. It’s just remarkable and he will surely be missed.
I’m rambling and this is not a well written note but I felt like I needed to just share these few things. I’m gonna miss running into him and seeing that smile.
Sending my deepest and sincere condolences and I’m continuing to pray for you. ~Kelly
1/10/23
Wendy Sheil
My memory is similar to many others, because that was Q, touching so many lives. A few of my nephews and nieces are close friends to Q so I met him through them. Immediately I was drawn to him, he just sucks you in like that. He hugged me like very few people do, so deeply and genuinely and called me “Auntie” right then and there. Never once did he call me by my name, it was always “Hi, Auntie!”, “How are ya, Auntie”! We were instantly family, no question, no declaration. I didn’t see him often but when I did, there it was - “Auntie” and love. Simply and honestly, love. I send to all who were touched by Q’s love, energy, laugh and spirit peace and one of those deep, loving hugs.
1/10/23
Kasie Eason
I met Quentin May 5, 2006 at a Hartford Block Party. He would always tell me that was the day I ruined his and Pj’s single summer. After that, we formed a friendship/sibling hood I was so proud to be apart of. Over the years he became an uncle to my children and married Pj and I in our home. His laughter brought attention anywhere he went. We spent many nights going to comedy clubs and he was ALWAYS the brunt of the comics jokes which I promise he didn’t hate! There will never be another Quentin and for that this world is a lot more dull. I miss you already my wild friend. Love you forever.
1/9/23
Amy Morrin Bello
I was a new State Rep working through my first session during the pandemic so I hadn't really gotten to know my colleagues all that well. I got a text from Rep Quentin Williams. He wasn't my assigned mentor. He wasn't the chair of a committee I was serving on. He didn't have a bill he was trying to solicit my vote for, he simply wanted to grab lunch and get to know me. So we meet up in Middletown, had a great lunch and talked for hours about our families, travel, our path to elected office. And what a pleasure it was to be in his company and just talk. It is rare to find someone who so readily makes time for others to feel seen and appreciated. Q was that special person that always made you feel important. Thank you, Q for sharing your wisdom and light with me for the short time we knew one another. My life is better because you were in it.
1/9/23
Robert Dobmeier
Love you Q. Met you when you first started on Middletown P&Z about 15 years ago or so. We use to chat about all kinds off things while we sat together at the end of the podium and those meetings went on late into the night. At that very point I knew you were destined for great things. So sad, because you deserved so much more. Will never forget that infectious smile of yours and great personality. Deepest sympathy to your family and all the Middletown community that was so proud of what you accomplished in your time here with us. We're all better off thanks to what you've given us over the past 39 years. Will miss you brother and RIP, Bob Dob 😢
1/9/23
CT DCF Commissioner Vannessa Dorantes
With every step, there was purpose… With every thought, there was action… With every smile, there was sincerity—- and mutual admiration.
My heart is saddened as we try and make sense of this loss. Having been one of many who had the privilege to be energized by and with Q every time we spoke… Jan 4th 2023, seemed particularly exciting as we chatted about the next “good trouble” we would make. How proud Q also was to become a member of our beloved “Phirst Phamily”!
Although his light has been dimmed, it will live on in the work. We each have a responsibility to continue his legacy of servant leadership and advocacy.
Q— Thank you for being a beacon of Truth, Justice and Equity. The children, families and communities of CT will continue to benefit from YOUR light.
“FOR THERE IS ALWAYS LIGHT, IF ONLY WE’RE BRAVE ENOUGH TO SEE IT… IF ONLY WE’RE BRAVE ENOUGH TO BE IT…” a. gorman
1/9/23
Angela Rodriquez Moore
My memories are with the Williams family at First Baptist Church of Whitesboro, NJ
1/9/23
Elaine F. Almquist
I met Q while we were both serving as representatives to the Young Democrats of America. He was such a light, so smart, funny, joyful, and witty. He loved to sing, and his voice and infectious smile will be joyous memories for me.
1/9/23
Corey Lemmons
Rocking that wonderful smile, even when you were a kiddo.
1/9/23
Jennifer Adorno
I remember when my sister threw me a surprise party for my 13th birthday at the Beacon Hill Clubhouse. Only a handful of friends came because, well, in the pre cell phone and social media era, the best way to spread the word about anything was at school. My birthday is at the end of the summer. But you know who did show up? Q. With his big smile and a wrapped gift— a 10 pack of fun sized Snickers. He knew they were my favorite. All he did was show up to his friend’s birthday party with her favorite candy bar. But it mattered to me. And stayed with me all these years.
Don’t think the little things you do don’t matter. They do. And Q knew that.
1/9/23
Pareesa Charmchi Goodwin
I met Q during the 2019 session. He was wearing a suit, a floral-patterned tie, and a backpack – he looked ready for anything! He was bouncing from meeting to meeting with gusto.
Before we knew each other well, Q showed up to a community conversation I hosted on oral health and called me after, asking “Who is championing dental therapy in the legislature? Do you need a champion? Because I am all-in.” We did need a champion. And that is what Connecticut has lost – a champion. But he wasn’t just that.
A friend - Q was fun and easy to get a long with. From health equity, to careers, curry goat, racism, housing, astrology (and teasing me for being a Scorpio), to holiday memories and family, Q could talk about anything. He made friends wherever he went and celebrated the success of others above his own.
A husband and son - Q constantly talked about how amazing his wife and mom are. He was so proud of Carrissa’s work. It was obvious he was madly in love with her. And he was in awe of his mom, Queen.
Q was Q – joyful, honest, fun, bold, full of love and light. I feel fortunate to have met him. Q is the kind of person who changes a community. He continues to inspire people to fight for and not compromise your beliefs while still getting things done. Q knew life was precious and he soaked it up. He will forever be a bold, joyful champion.
1/9/23
Adam Stiles
Quentin and I grew up in Woodbury Circle, two doors down from each other. We were both only children, and he was the closest thing I had to a brother. We both came from single Moms, who worked so very hard to support us. This meant that there were many times we helped the other when one of our mothers was at work. As a sharp dressed man, I am not actually sure when he finally learned to tie a necktie, as there were countless times my mother or I had to do it for him! For many years, I stayed over his house several nights a week while my Mom was working third shift. It was just what we did for each other without a second thought. I'm sure that he probably borrowed 50 pounds of sugar for Kool Aid over the years! My favorite memory of him was when I had a dance in high school, my Mom had to work, so Q followed me to my dates house, and then to my grandparents so he could take pictures and make sure I didn't butcher putting on the corsage. In the end, I think I did OK, and my Mom had plenty of pics! I remember seeing some of his opponents slinging mud during the lead up to his first State Rep election. It made me furious because of how wrong it was, and how much above that pettiness he was. The only negative thing I can think of Quentin is how he liked to "sue" people in Monopoly! I think our house rules helped prepare him for a career in politics. I don't know a person who deserved to be a public servant more than him, and it saddens me I will never get to vote for him running for governor or president. The world is genuinely a darker place without him in it, and he will truly be missed.
1/9/23
Robin Warde
Q was such a force on Bryant University's campus -- A true leader who knew how to bring people together. On the Bryant Alumni Facebook page, there are dozens of comments and remembrances. I've attached a photo from his campus visit in March 2018 to speak with students.
1/9/23
Corey Lemmons
One of my favorite photos of us bro. You were my first friend on this earth, you helped make me the man that I am today. Without you I wouldn't have the life that I do. I love you bro
1/9/23
Ashley
Seeing Q walk down Main Street at the Memorial Day parade. A smile as long as the street and permanent image to be remembered. You couldn’t help but smile and wave. Rest In Peace.
1/9/23
Corey Lemmons
Prom 2000
1/9/23
Mairead Painter
The long-term care residents in Middletown as well across the state of Connecticut benefited from Representative Quentin Williams support and commitment. He saw them as members of the community with no less right to his advocacy than anyone else. In fact, he was the voice for the people many others did not see or hear. He used his position to create meaningful change in his community and across the state for individuals who did not always feel represented or heard.
During COVID my office was receiving calls from residents and family members related to their experience in their nursing homes. So, I reached out to Rep. Q. as he was one of the Aging Committee Co-chairs at that time. He said give me the 101 on this, what do I need to know and what do we need to change to ensure these residents are receiving quality care. That is just the way he was, dedicated to service and committed to being a conduit for change that improved the lives of the individuals he served. Residents at some of his local nursing homes wrote to him about poor care and he went out to meet with them personally. He wanted them to see that he supported them and that he was dedicated to improving their quality of life. He wanted to know what he could do to ensure that individuals living in long-term care communities had access to appropriate care and services.
It made me laugh when he would call and say Madame Ombudswoman, I have a question for you. He would always pose something that he had learned or heard. He would want to know if I thought we could improve the situation or if such a change would be good for the people he was working with. That legislative session he worked to develop and move forward several bills that directly impacted and improved the quality of care and quality of life for individuals living in Connecticut’s long term care communities. Representative Quentin Williams your advocacy, smile, laugh, and general spirit are going to be greatly missed.
~ Mairead Painter State Long-Term Care Ombudsperson
1/9/23
Ray B.
I met Q very briefly years ago. I was with mutual friends and Q burst in with his booming voice and immediately lit up the room. His laugh was just as loud and contagious. He left a lasting impression on me just in that singular moment. I know he was a good person just by the company he kept and how he impacted so many different lives from different groups. I’m glad I met him even for that brief time.
1/9/23
Roseanne Bisaillon
I was a classmate of Q’s, graduating a couple years before him. Even then, I knew he was destined for making change! He was very active in student council.
Then as I went on to be an educator in MPS, I remember Q coming in during our convocation to really highlight how important the education of Middletown students was to him!
Finally, Q was such an advocate for people in his community. This picture is of him speaking at a Juneteenth event on Middletown’s South Green.
At his vigil, seeing SO many people there who were touched by this one amazing person was extremely beautiful. All the speakers shared a common theme. Q lead his life with love, servitude to his community, and a drive to advocate for his family, friends, and the people of Middletown. His bright light will be remembered by these acts, his beautiful smile, and infectious laugh!
1/9/23
Jessica Stram
Q was one of the earliest friends I made in Young Dems. Beyond the CT chapter, he was plugged into a whole network of other folks that he met at national conferences. He warmly welcomed me into that family and helped me make deep and meaningful connections with people from across the country. When I decided to run for VP of Young Democrats of America, Q bought a ticket and flew himself down to the convention where he worked as my “body man” and staffed me throughout the whole event. He made sure I had food and coffee, that I was on time to key meetings, and generally made sure I was cared for during a stressful endeavor. Q in a nutshell: showing up for friends was his superpower. There are so many other small ways he did this for me over our 15 + years as friends and I can only hope I returned this back to him. I will miss my friend endlessly.
1/9/23
Heather Tolley-Bauer
I just can’t stop thinking about Q his wife, his mother, and my adopted home town of Middletown, CT. This is a loss for humankind. I used to kid him that I was old enough to be his slightly older but much cooler older sister. The truth is, I was more than a decade older, he was way cooler and so much wiser than I was. We were always at the same events, for the Chamber of Commerce, Oddfellows Playhouse, Green Street Arts Center or on the same committees, except he’d blow into a Young Professional’s Alliance social with a suit on his frame and a smile on his face and then tell me he had to be somewhere else… a young democrats event, a fundraiser for Columbus House, a meeting for something he was chairing and I’d go home and go to bed 🤣.
He had no off switch. Making a difference was is destiny and it’s so clear from the tributes pouring in he did.
1/8/23
Beth
From the Cape Cod Times
1/8/23
Barbara Crouch
I met Q through Erika. He was always so kind and had an incredible gift of seeing problems from all sides. Intelligent, funny, and kind...❤️
1/8/23
Lisa Chlebowski
Anytime I would see Q out and about in Middletown, he would stop to chat. We didn’t know each other well, but seeing him always seemed like running into an old friend.
1/8/23
Rachel L. Koch (again)
I was thinking back on the first time I met Q. After hearing about him so much, our first Halloween in NH, 2015, I remember walking in Fat Belly’s having never met him and we both walked towards one another and hugged so big because I’m positive at that point Carrissa had shared so much to both of us about the other that I felt like I knew him already. Instantly, I felt like I’d known him forever. And that feeling stuck with me for as long as I knew Q. Down to the last time I saw him at Erica’s wedding. My memory of that day was walking down the aisle and the first face I recognized was his - sticking his tongue out at me and smiling so big. He had a way of making people feel so loved and seen. The whole night we all danced together on the dance floor and it felt like no time had past, even though it had been years since I’d seen Carrissa and Q. I still and always will consider Carrissa one of my most cherished friends as we experienced so much together during the first 2 years of our friendship and even with years apart - we can so easily pick up where we left off. So many memories of the 6 of us - me and Mike, Erica and Josh, and Carrissa and Q. #RideorCryForever
1/8/23
Savannah Boales
I met Que at freshman orientation in college and we stayed friends over the years through weddings, birthdays and planned gatherings with our college crew. When I think of Que, I see a big smile on his face. I can picture him laughing hysterically about something. He always made us laugh. I can hear him yelling “Got Em!” When he met my mom in college during parents’ weekend, he said “I didn’t know you had a sister.” He was so charming. He spent my 30th birthday with me and a small group of friends at the casino. He was cracking jokes at the dinner table. He was my date for more than one wedding. He was so much fun on the dance floor. A group of us stayed over his mom’s house in Middletown (I think for his 30th birthday). I remember Que (with some help from Queen) making pancakes for us in the morning. We got a kick out of watching Que cook, as he was making such a mess but really enjoying himself.
Que was truly an amazing person with a heart of gold and a spirit that uplifted everyone around him. I will always remember the good times we had that were filled with fun and laughter.
1/8/23
Peter Brazaitis
When I was just looking to get involved as a young democrat, I wasn't too sure if the CT Young Democrats was the right group for me. I had been to previous events and always felt out of place. But that changed once I met Q who was the President, he not only introduced me around, but helped make the group a little less intimidating and definitely seem a little friendlier. I eventually met so many people who I call friends to this day, including Q. I eventually became President of the CT Young Democrats myself and relied on Q for advice and support. He was always there for me, and I was happy to support him whenever he needed it too. His warmth and friendship made me happy to have joined the organization, and even happier to have a friend like him. You meet the best and the worst in politics, Q was by far, the best. I will miss him dearly.
1/8/23
Jon Johnson
Shared to my Pint O' Comics radio show Facebook page when I learned of Q's passing:
"Quentin "Q" (Phipps) Williams - I first met you, an exuberant and very happy youth, when your mom would bring you to Macx Comics on Lower Washington St. in Middletown, CT. It was great running into you throughout the years at various nerd gatherings or comic stores around the state, and it was always nice to bump into you after you'd moved into local and then state politics... where you'd ask if I was still reading comics. You'll be missed and remembered by many, many people."
1/8/23
Jennifer Adorno
Q and I would always share this story. In 8th grade, Q wanted to run for student council President. For whatever reason, he believed we’d win if I ran with him. I wanted nothing to do with politics. But he was determined. He said “Jen, I promise..WHEN we win, you won’t have to do anything. Just show up.” I could see how badly he wanted it, so I said, “Okay, Q, I got you.” Next thing I knew, I was wrapping our names around lollipops to pass out at school. Even then, he sure knew how to run a campaign. We won. And he kept his promise. He was always there for me, just the same, no matter how big or small. Like wanting to make my sleepovers “interesting” by prank calling my house to give all the girls a little scare. That was Q. Ambitious and hardworking, but still played hard and enjoyed life. I miss you, Q. I know you’re not worried about Queen and Carrissa. You built one hell of a village for them. We got them. 💖
1/8/23
Nathan Wolliston
I can count on hands the number of interactions I’ve had with Q, but the impact he’s had on my life is immeasurable and continues to grow. 39 years of selflessness and black excellence. I’m grateful that he’s set the bar so high, I hope to compete in time but he truly has not made it easy. Thank you Q for the legacy you’ve left young black men to chase!
1/8/23
Tracey Elise Hardman
Like everyone, I have so many inspirational memories of Q- because every visit or talk with Q inevitably ended up being inspirational. He always made you not just WANT to be a better person; Q made you believe you already were a better person full of the possibility of making the world better too. Just by being around him.
I have one very specific memory of Q which means so much to me. He had asked me out to lunch to discuss some aspects of the Democratic party and it turned out during that lunch that he wanted to see if I possibly might be interested in some lower level political office.
While I absolutely was not interested in office myself, I told him I would support him and all of his causes in every way. Then we just got to having a really really nice lunch and chatting. He then told me of his background and his incredible single Mother, Queen. The love and admiration in his eyes when he spoke of her made tears spring to my eyes in that restaurant that day.
I will never forget, as we talked of more of our backgrounds and where we went to college, I told him I had played rugby in undergrad. And at first I thought he played rugby too, so I said to him – you played rugby too?
He laughed and said, ‘Heck no! Have you SEEN this face? I would not do anything to risk any damage to this work of nature (as he framed his wonderful face with his hands.)
Yes, Q- you were as handsome as you were extraordinary and I’m glad no Rugby games never changed that my dapper friend.
And then he told me of Carissa. Just when you thought his face couldn’t get brighter nor his smile bigger, he talked of Carissa. And, all bets were off.
He told me of how they had been talking with their hearts in their souls before they finally met over either a layover or an airport or some sort of a travel situation. He said the second that he saw her, he knew. But he actually said he already knew. What a gift you gave him Carissa to have loved him so and to have let know such incredible profound true love in his devastatingly too short time with us all on this Earth.
1/8/23
Mary
He was funny, a great guy, and once gave me chips when i was hungry
1/8/23
Barry Rodgers
I was born and raised in middletown,ct and have been living in portland,ct for the past 22 years.I met Q at our Juneteenth Event back in 2021 where he along with myself and others did speeches.I told him that I would be running as candidate for the portland board of education,he smiled and said "Do you have a campaign manager?I'm right here."He offered his advice to me and even when I lost the election he still offered advice and clarity.I recently told him I plan on running in 2023 and he gave me the best advice of all and that was to remember what I stand for,believe more in myself and keep the faith and that he was looking forward to seeing me campaign again.I am so thankful for his conversation and motivation.Q,you will be greatly and sadly missed.
Barry Rodgers
1/8/23
April Capone
I met Q and other Young Dems when I ran for East Haven Town Council in 2005. I was 30 yo and had never run for office before. Q and the Young Dems gave me information and support. My entire campaign budget was the $350 Young Dems grant.
Several years later when I was serving as Mayor of East Haven Q and I were in DC for the Young Elected Officials convening. He was Treasurer of Middletown and I was urging him to run for mayor against the Republican incumbent. He looked at me and said, deadpan ‘I’d rather have an STD, at least that might go away……no offense…..mayor.’ Then he let out the signature Q laugh that echoed throughout the building.
Like all of us, I am better for knowing him. The world is darker without him.
1/8/23
Alan Cavagnaro
For the Spring 2022 Legislative Session, I was reported to intern for Rep. Q Williams. The work I did for him included legislative research, managing constituent responses, and special projects. My first few interactions with Q reminded me of why I love public service. He was open-minded, charismatic, and had a passion for getting things done for the people. I often recall our encounters uplifting my mood for the day - he was looking out for everyone.
The work I completed for Q included memos on potential housing committee bills he wanted to introduce in the coming years. These bills were going to help tenants and prospective renters. He taught me almost everything I know about affordable housing policy in the state. He encouraged me to testify on bills, which I did because of him. He was a person with a mission to solve the world's problems and we weren't ready for Q.
Additionally, we even both had a background in serving our respective towns' Planning and Zoning Commissions. When I entered the internship, I told Q about my goal of amending our current zoning regulations in South Windsor to make them more affordable for people. He gave me some good advice and tips for my work on my Planning and Zoning Commission. As I'm writing this now, we have a few months until those regulations are voted on. It makes me happy to know some of Q's ideas are in our zoning regulations, aimed at making living affordable in my community.
Less than 90 minutes before his crash in January of 2023, I had a short, but impactful conversation with Q at the inaugural ball. When we conversed, he was excited to see me, as I was excited to see him. I told Q about the work I had done for the new job I had (which related to affordable housing). He was also excited to hear about our new zoning regulations in South Windsor. The very last moment I had with Q, he told me that he was proud of me and he promised we would talk soon. Just like that, we departed for the final time.
I tell all these stories because this is the type of person Q was. His mission was to help people, solve problems, and be a leader for those who needed a hand. Because of Q, I know much more than I did. He reinvigorated my passion for public service and he reminded me of why we fight the good fight.
Rest in Power Q.
1/8/23
Dina Annino
I only met him twice, but he was so kind and beaming with happiness both times. Listening to the things said about him at the vigil confirms what a special person he must have been. We can all hope to leave that kind of loving legacy of service when our time here is done. RIP, and condolences to his loved ones. 🙏
1/8/23
Matt Engelhardt
I've been fortunate to see some pretty incredible comedians during my life, but no set will ever top a performance at the Hartford Funny Bone by Canadian comic Ian Bagg. But here's the thing - Bagg's act had almost nothing to do with what made the whole night so memorable. That honor belongs to my dear friend Quentin Williams.
This website wouldn't exist if everyone didn't have their own Q story. That's part of what made him so special. From his high school classmates to Governor Lamont to Congresswoman DeLauro, Q has left an impression on every person he has ever met. For many of us, that impression includes that incredible, loud, boisterous laugh of his. If you heard it once, you'd never forget it it: sort of a combination Eddie Murphy meets Louis from "Revenge of the Nerds," amplified by 10,000 decibels.
I first heard that laugh in what was then Woodrow Wilson Middle School, more than 25 years ago. Q and I sat together as trumpet players in the band and we became friends. Years later, we found ourselves heading out with a large group of friends to the Hartford Funny Bone, where they sat us close enough to the stage where the comics would be able to see us but far enough away where maybe we wouldn't be too noticeable.
Except for the fact that Q was with us. And we were in a comedy club, watching and listening to people whose sole purpose was to make us laugh. And there was a two drink minimum.
By the time headliner Bagg took the stage, Q's laugh had already filled the club multiple times. The openers gave him the occasional look, but mostly took his reactions as a compliment. And Bagg is a pretty funny guy - he's no Patton Oswalt, but the guy has toured extensively and has a solid act. But my goodness, did Q find Bagg funny.
Several times during the set, Q's guffaws bellowed throughout the Funny Bone, loud enough to make the waitresses stop in their tracks and every customer practically choke themselves with their own laughter. Every time, the comedian himself chuckled, stopped his act, and checked to make sure that Quentin was okay. The rest of us at Q's table were in tears we were laughing so hard, too entertained and gleeful to be the least bit humiliated. It was a fantastic, unforgettable night, one I still look back at with nothing but great joy.
Q lived an incredible life and will rightfully be remembered for his leadership, his ability to inspire, and for the potential that has been taken away. And while I reflect on all this, I am just so thankful for that evening at the Funny Bone, for Ian Bagg's act that Q found so funny, and for the laugh that will always remind me of my good friend.
1/8/23
Monica Rios
Q and I worked together at Stamford Charter School for Excellence. He was all about positivity and change. The students absolutely adored him. He offered advice to anyone who needed and lent an ear whenever someone needed to vent. He is the reason I made the purchase of my home. We shared stories and had many laughs together. I can clearly hear his voice and laugh in my mind as if he was right next to me. He will be missed. RIP <3
1/8/23
Michelle Alexander
Quentin is my younger first cousin, my little cousin. Though he was my “little cousin, “ he was indeed a good “big cousin,” to my three children. Whenever we visited from Philadelphia, Quentin would often take his little cousins out on the town - to some community activity/event, out to eat, and each evening was topped off with a visit to Cold Stone. He made their trips to CT fun and memorable.
In the evenings he would sit and play games with them, and of course talk. He always engaged them and made them feel special. Never did he razzle and dazzle them by bragging about himself, but he sat, and laughed, and talked with them - he strengthened them, he made them feel like stars. Those three younger stars and this one older cousin will always remember Quentin, “Our Shining Star.”
1/8/23
Lindsey
From the moment I met Q, he made me feel like family, even when I was simply just the new girlfriend of his cousin. He had a way with making you instantly feel welcome. I reminisce on how incredible it was to watch him marry such an amazing woman, Carrissa. The love between them was palpable and Q’s #OnTheBoat speech has stuck with me to this day. Any time I ever interacted with Q he emitted this force of positive energy, excited for his next endeavor. I am so sad the last time I saw him was at Kwami and my wedding, although the memories made are ones I will hold dear to my heart. These few photos make me smile at how accurately they represent his optimistic and charismatic personality. We have all lost such an amazing human who was also doing incredible things for the people of CT. I know I will miss you dearly, RIP Q.
1/8/23
Melissa Schilke
Like all theaters at the height of the Covid pandemic, Oddfellows Playhouse had to shutter it's doors in March of 2020. Q and I were among the twenty or so OP supporters and board members who stood on the Playhouse steps as the last person leaving the theater "left a light on." This light on theater tradtion is a single ghost lamp on the stage, to light up the dark when everyone has gone home.
Uncertain times were ahead for Oddfellows Playhouse.
People were pretty sad and upon wrapping up the gathering, when Q looked at me with that great big smile and broke out into a happy rendition of "You are my Sunshine, " leading me and the others gathered on the outdoor steps to join in song, putting a happy ending to a somber night. That was Q, finding the light.
1/8/23
Mary Ellen Molski
For Middletown High School's Diversity Day in 2018, my classroom was being used to host group discussions about the newly-released song, "This is America" by Childish Gambino. The speaker could not come at the last minute, and I delayed the first group's talk so I could figure out an alternative plan. Enter Q, literally from the stairwell, to the second floor and my doorstep! While we exchanged greetings I explained my predicament, and without hesitation, he said, "We got this." He took off his suit jacket, sat down in the circle with the first group of students, and within seconds had them sharing stories about themselves. We watched the music video, discussed symbolism, meaning, and themes, and he related their commentary back to their lives. He stayed to run the other two groups, thanked me for an enjoyable morning, and went on with his day. That morning remains one of my most cherished memories as a teacher, and one of the most explicit mergings in my career of content and community. Thank you, Q.
1/8/23
Sarah Shapiro & Rohan Manning
We have struggled to find the right words to say in the aftermath of this tragedy. Like so many others, we lost a dear friend and community leader in Q Williams that night.
To me, Q has been a friend for decades. We both made our way, born and raised in this town we love, in the halls of Middletown High. Despite being a few years younger than me, no matter what it was, he always managed to be in the mix. He always made you feel like you were the most important person in the room, and that you were loved. He was completely genuine.
When we became young adults, Q affectionately called me "Counselor." He started working out at the gym, and his hugs suddenly matched the enormity of his laughter - larger than life! When I brought Rohan to Middletown, Q immediately welcomed him into the fold. He affectionately referred to Ro as "me brethren", and I became his "Ja-merican sister." He called us these names of endearment every single time we saw him, without fail.
As he took his seat in the CT legislature, I applauded his growing collection of floral neckties. He called me with excitement when they began working on a direct flight from Hartford to Jamaica, and said, "get your family ready for vacation!"
I first met Carrissa when she moved to Middletown. Coincidentally, or not, I helped them close on my father's childhood home, and my mother was thrilled to speculate that Dr. Martin Luther King had been a visitor of the subsequent owner of the home. Carrissa was Q's match in every way. Full of life. Selfless. Ready to help anyone who needed it. They shined brighter together.
Even as Q's career took flight, he never forgot his roots. Middletown and its people came first. Even though he was a politician, which is often a negative word, he was able to walk a line of fairness and equity, saw everyone for who they were, and might be the single politician who really was adored by all.
And if you called Q, he would come. He helped my mother, Deborah Shapiro, with so many civic projects and initiatives, and was in attendance of every community event. Most recently he was working with Rohan to bring baseball back to the minority youth of Middletown. We don't know where he found the time and energy for it all, but he did.
Our hearts break for his beautiful wife and mom, his family and closest friends. We hope the outpouring of tributes somehow bring them comfort. We thank them for sharing Q with the rest of us.
Quite simply, to know Q was to love Q. We pray that his light continues to shine, that we continue to champion his efforts of equality with the same unending reach of his smile.
Rest in peace and love, our Ja-merican brother.
1/8/23
Ali Sinicrope
I don’t remember when I met Q, just that the instant I did, I felt like had known him forever. His huge laugh, coupled with his animated ways of telling stories, captivated me and everyone else who met him.
Mostly, Q had such an incredible way of making any person he met feel seen and important. And—he would truly listen when people spoke— a quality that is hard to find nowadays.
Q had a small cameo in the show Legally Blonde that I directed for Middletown Stage back in 2012. It was a small role— but Q made it big (I honestly don’t think he ever did anything on a small scale). The bit was hilarious— and something that people still remember and talk about.
Q really believed in Middletown— I’m so saddened to know that he won’t be a part of that community any longer. He deserved to live. This is so incredibly unfair.
Rest in peace, my friend.
1/8/23
Kat Owens
I first knew who Q was when he ran for office in my district. So, I ‘knew’ him in the way you know people who are involved in politics. I knew him, but besides sending emails to his office about issues important to me, I hadn’t spent a lot of time with him.
Then I went with friends to workout at Club 24, where Q was often there when we were—early in the AM. These friends, Paola and Sowgol, knew him better and so we were introduced and our paths crossed more frequently.
If you ever worked out at the same gym as Q you know that he was UNMISSABLE at the gym. He had a wonderful habit of shouting out inspirational and motivational things while he worked out. It was delightful and inspiring—it always made me smile.
Because I run a program at the University of Hartford, I’m on the lookout for people who I think would be great as faculty. This program has a class called Leadership: Challenges and Opportunities. I thought—who better than Q—someone who is grappling with those challenges and opportunities on a weekly basis—to teach the class. I asked if he might be interested and to my delight he said yes. He also shared that it would be an honor for him to teach undergrads, because so often during his own educational experiences he had not seen people like him—men of color— teaching. He said he’d like to be that person—that positive example-- for the students coming after him.
His student evaluations often talked about the great conversations they had during class, how much they learned, and—no surprise—how enthusiastic he was in the classroom.
As the news broke I was, like everyone in Middletown, inundated with stories on people’s feeds about Q. I think we forget sometimes, when someone is so embedded in the fabric of our community, how involved they are in everything.
How much we depend on them.
How much we count on them—we know whatever we do or ask, they will be there.
Q is like that for Middletown and for so many people.
Whatever I asked of him—he always said yes- enthusiastically and with his whole heart-. Even more meaningfully, I know that it wasn't just me. He did the same for everyone.
1/8/23
Raymond Green
Brother, writing this is probably the most painful thing I’ve done in a long time. Man you were such an inspiration to so many people. I wish I was as charismatic and sociable as you. I always wondered how you were always so upbeat and full of life. I guess you were just living. It’s just who you are bro. Someone who brings light into every dark room, put a smile on every face. I’ll never forget those big hugs. Arms wide open chest up standing proud and ready to give you the most heartwarming embrace. How is it so easy for you to make everyone feel so connected to you. How do you not ever change up, or falter from character. Being a brother to you has been a honor and a opportunity to learn from the realest kindest funniest liveliest honest loving person I’ve ever met. Til we meet again my brother. I love you.
1/8/23
Beth
The New York Times
January 5, 2003.
Connecticut Lawmaker Killed in Head-On Collision After Inaugural Ball
State Representative Quentin Williams
By Karen Zraick
Jan. 5, 2023
A Connecticut state representative on his way home from an inaugural ball to kick off the new term was killed when a wrong-way driver hit him head-on early Thursday, state police said.
Officials from across the state mourned the loss of State Representative Quentin Williams of Middletown, a city about a 20-minute drive south of the capital, Hartford. Gov. Ned Lamont ordered the state flag to be lowered to half-staff in honor of Mr. Williams, calling his loss “devastating.”
The crash occurred on Route 9 in Cromwell, just north of Middletown, at about 12:45 a.m. The Connecticut State Police said that Mr. Williams was traveling south when he was hit by a vehicle traveling north in the southbound lane. The driver of that vehicle, 27-year-old Kimede Katie Mustafaj of Manchester, Conn., was also killed.
The car driven by Mr. Williams, 39, was “fully engulfed in flames” after the crash, according to the police.
State lawmakers closed the Capitol Complex and canceled meetings for Thursday and Friday. State Senator Matt Lesser noted that Mr. Williams, who was a Democrat, had just been appointed chair of the Labor and Public Employees Committee. He was planning to lead its first meeting of the year on Thursday.
The mayor of Hartford, Luke Bronin, posted a photo of himself next to Mr. Williams at the black-tie party on Wednesday night, describing him as full of energy and passion for his work. The event was held at the Bushnell, a performing arts venue in Hartford. The Bacon Brothers — a duo consisting of the actor Kevin Bacon and his brother Michael — were among the performers.
“We are all devastated and heartbroken by the news this morning,” Mr. Bronin said at another event on Thursday morning.
The state’s attorney general, William Tong, said in a statement that he met “Q,” as Mr. Williams was known, when Mr. Williams was an advocate for a local school in Stamford.
“I can only think of one word to describe him — hopeful,” Mr. Tong said. “Q was always brimming with optimism and possibility. He had a spirit that was relentlessly positive and aspirational. We need his light more than ever, and that’s why it is so hard to lose him.”
Mr. Williams is survived by his wife, Carrissa Williams, said Mr. Lesser, who was acting as a spokesman for the family.
Mr. Williams was first elected in 2019 and had been sworn into office on Wednesday for his third term serving the 100th District, which includes downtown Middletown and Wesleyan University.
He was a lifelong resident of the city and the first African American to represent it in Connecticut’s General Assembly, according to his biography on the State House Democrats’ website.
He got his start in community banking in Hartford and then went into nonprofit management, becoming executive director of the Middletown Downtown Business District, and then director of advocacy and policy for Excellence Community Schools, a charter school network, the biography said.
He also co-founded the educational nonprofit EquityCT, served on the boards of many local groups and taught a leadership course at the University of Hartford, the biography said.
Wrong-way driving on highways and turnpikes is particularly lethal because the impact speed is doubled when two cars collide at 50 miles per hour or more.
“The laws of physics come into play,” said Andrew Gross, a spokesman for the AAA. “We know the car’s ability to protect you ends at 56 miles per hour and that’s running into something stationary.”
Christine Negroni contributed reporting.
© 2023 New York Times
1/8/23
Chris Dubey
Q, I only really knew you a little in middle school and high school but you stood out for your leadership and amiable personality. I remember it being funny when you were voted Pessimist for the high school yearbook (I heard because you were vocal with criticism of ideas at times in student council, which I was not on) and you said, "My class doesn't know me at all," but you took it with good humor. I also remember the first time we met as kids at MG's birthday party at Chuck E Cheese's and how you gave me extra money to play with. My brother who became a teacher in Middletown got to know you better and I know you were warm and friendly with my mother also who still lives there. Hope you are able to continue your adventures and good times in the Great Beyond.
1/8/23
Tricia and Bob Dynia
We've heard so many wonderful things about this gentleman over the past few days. And that smile? His entire face smiles. It's in his eyes, and we wish we'd known him personally. Our hearts go out to his family and friends. So young. Way too young.
1/8/23
Roisin Ford
I’ve been sitting with the grief of losing Quentin since the moment I learned of his death. It’s unimaginable, like a nightmare we’re not waking from.
Truly within five minutes of meeting him, he was going to tell you that he was Ms Queen Williams’s son and more recently, Carrissa Philippe Williams‘s husband. It brought some comfort at his vigil to hear a speaker say that, and his assembled loved ones to all nod in agreement. Your entire community is holding both of you in our hearts. I’m so sorry for your loss, Carrissa and Ms Williams.
Carrissa, my memories actually relate to the first time I met you. You said something like “I’m so glad to meet you because Quentin talks about you all the time.” I remember being relieved that you said that because I certainly was not going to blow up Quentin’s spot in front of this person who was CLEARLY his soulmate, but Quentin had beaten me to it. It sounds crazy that someone elected multiple times to city and state positions would be bothered by a crushing political defeat more than two decades prior and yet here we were. The fact is that you were in on the joke just made me so happy because clearly he was with someone who appreciated him.
He was exactly who he was at all times. He and my husband met 20 years ago, while Quentin and I were both in town on break from college. My husband is from Brooklyn and had some pre-conceived notions of what Middletown was and wasn’t. I feel like meeting Quentin, and yes, learning of how I was Quentin’s archrival, really helped him to understand me where I came from and what shaped me, in a way I couldn’t have explained.
There’s things he said, and there’s things that he embodied and demonstrated. You could not put him into a box. He was a self-professed nerd but also a state-wide 4x400 and medley relay athlete. He was a proud son of Jamaica, but also as Polish as I was, if not more. He never felt an obligation to act how society had stereotyped him to be, and that confidence impacted those around him in ways we’ll never know.
I could go on and on. I can tell you that in the past 96 hours countless classmates have reached out in grief and disbelief. We are keeping our class of 2001 Facebook page updated, including a link to the RememberingQ site. We will amplify whatever memorial contributions the family decides to do and most importantly, we are just holding you both, Damian, PJ, Junior, Alexis, Raymond, And everyone in his life in our hearts.
Sincerely,
Roisin
1/8/23
Rachel Drake
I moved to Middletown in August of 2005 with my soon to be husband. We weren't from Connecticut. We knew very few people in the state of Connecticut, and nearly no one in Middletown. But Middletown was mid-way for us: Chris starting a clerkship at the Federal Courthouse in Hartford, and I about to start an internship at Yale New Haven Hospital. We found an apartment on Pearl Street, and quickly realized Middletown was going to be the place we laid down roots. Early on, Chris dragged me to a Middletown Democrats event at what is now called Mezzo Grill (I think it was called Fish and Bones, or something along those lines at the time). We hadn't been in Middletown very long at the time. Q was one of the very first people we met that day. He was someone you don't forget.
At the time, I remember thinking his boisterous, over the top personality couldn't possibly be real. How could someone have that much energy, joy, and excitement all the time? It didn't seem possible that someone could actually be all that, all the time, with the dial at 10.
As Chris became more involved in Middletown politics, and as I encountered Q more in the community as months became years, the more I began to understand that the Q you saw was the Q you got, always. The personality I encountered that first time meeting him didn't turn off, whether I saw him at a Dems event or the grocery store. He was joy personified.
Then he moved in two houses down from us. He never missed an opportunity to say hi. Even if he was on the phone, or seemed to be rushing off somewhere, he would stop, smile, wave and say "hi neighbor". It became somewhat of a running joke, and no matter when, or where I saw him, that would be his greeting. Even long after he moved off our block, it was always "hi neighbor" or "howdy neighbor".
I can't say I knew him well. I can say I wish I did. I wish I had taken the opportunity when he was my actual neighbor. But as a new mom, working 40 minutes away in New Haven, it just never felt like I had the time or chance to. I think that is something I will always regret. He was the type of person I would have enjoyed knowing better, and spending time with. He was the type of person who seems to bring out the best in the people around him. He was the type of person we should all be striving to be more like. Love and joy personified.
There was an Middletown Democrats event at the Canoe Club in June 2018. My mother and sisters were visiting us from out of state, and being good sports, came along for the brunch. I remember Q coming and sitting with my family, and doing exactly what he did when I first met him all those years prior. He sat and talked with them, asked them questions, laughed with them, and made them feel welcome. He truly was a very special person and had a very special way of bringing people into the fold.
Q was a person who never seemed to be bothered by the "ask". Any time I reached out to him about issues or concerns, he always responded right away. If he didn't have the answer, he found it. Although it seems to me that he rarely didn't have the answer or solution to what I needed readily at hand.
Q made you feel welcomed and seen, and that you mattered. He made me feel welcome here in Middletown, a place that we had no family, or friends, or community in those early days. Middletown is special place, in part because of Q and the ways he loved Middletown, and the people who call it home. It has become my family's home, and it is a place I am proud to live in. Q was part of that, and he will be missed. I vow that I will continue to try to make Middletown a place that is warm and welcoming to all. I will carry Q with me in all I do, especially in trying to make Middletown the best place it can be, for everyone.
Until we can say "hi neighbor" again, rest in power Q.
1/8/23
Kori Termine Wisneski
Middletown lost its biggest advocate and fan on January 5th and it's hard to put into words how much he impacted this community and those around him. I was privileged to first meet Q when he joined the Board of the YMCA. He was dedicated to all things Middletown and was a huge advocate for this local non-profit as well as so many others, including Oddfellows. Any time I would see him around town, whether it be at a Board meeting or at Eli's for the pig roast, he always had a larger-than-life personality. He smiled and laughed like no other and his happiness and positivity were contagious.
When I joined the City in 2012 as Deputy General Counsel, Q was one of the first people I met with on a difficult issue. He had a wonderful way of challenging you to be the best you could be, or in this case, making sure my research was thorough, but at the same time being respectful when he didn't receive the advice or news he wanted to hear. He always addressed me as "Counselor" and used to quip that I was the most researched attorney he knew because of that initial professional encounter.
Years later when he joined the legislature, he was always willing to answer my calls or emails. One time in particular, I encouraged him to attempt to change a law that had a negative impact on victims. He immediately went into action, proposing a change in committee. While this law did not ultimately pass, he reassured me that all was not lost and that he would look for other opportunities to address the injustice.
Most recently, he came to City Hall for a meeting to discuss his new project -- the state mandate requiring all municipalities over a certain population to create a Fair Housing Commission. It was no small task, but he led the charge, and had led the charge at the state to get this legislation passed. He was confident, poised, and had a vision for this work. He was no longer a rookie legislator; he was finding his voice and putting his ideas into action, and it was beautiful to witness. The week before his passing, I began writing the fair housing ordinance that is now required because of his work. I intend to present it to a city commission this week and will talk about Q's dedication to this project.
What I find so heartbreaking about this tragedy is that Q was just getting started. He had accomplished so much in his short 39 years, but he had so much more to give and we as a community and as a state had so much more to gain from his passion. There can never be another Q, but I do hope that others are inspired by his work and his life to get involved in their communities and to make a difference like he did in ours. My heart goes out to his wife Carrissa and his mother Queen. You should both be so proud. He was a wonderful man, friend, colleague, and community leader. He simply was the best. May his memory be a blessing.
1/8/23
Yvonne Krol Kitchel
Q IS Middletown and always made me feel like family. The life of the party, the smartest and savviest person in the room. Back to making chamber events fun and him asking me all the questions about the best places in Vegas. There through my darkest days and I will forever be grateful for even the little check in texts. It always surprised me that he had time to think of me with his busy schedule, but that was Q. The biggest heart with an even bigger smile.
1/8/23
Diane Hayn
I met Quentin on a bus while chaperoning his kindergarten field trip. He sat in the seat across from me. Even back then he had an infectious personally, he had my ear and talked the whole trip. I remember saying to him “Quentin; I know I will be voting for you some day for President”. His response “I’m going to start local”. I cracked up! He knew at 6 what he wanted to do. He and my son Adam became good friends and spent a lot of time at our house. He use to call me mom. I was in Stop and Shop I hear someone yell across the floor….”Hey Mom”. I turned to see Quentin. I got the biggest hug! I loved that kid. 💔 I am just heart broken. I will miss that smile 😘 Diane Hayn (mom)
1/8/23
Kate Farrar
Two years ago, I was sworn into office as State Representative for the first time. Little did I know it would be the start of being loved by Q. Q loved big and lived big, never taking the future for granted. There was no one I knew who was more alive and present than Q. At the heart of it, Q was the embodiment of love. Love in all forms. In his smile. In his hugs. In his listening. In his eloquence. In his silliness. In his policymaking.
And he showed his love in how he believed in you - often more than you might believe in yourself. The night of the Inaugural Ball, Q made his way throughout the chaotic and celebratory evening stopping to chat and laugh (that big laugh!) with so many. Walking over with his tux and signature paisley pocket square, he insisted on talking to my husband Chan about me. He wanted to tell Chan how much he loved me, how proud he was of me, and how much he believed in me to keep doing amazing things for our state. This is who Q was and will always be to me. He loved us all so deeply and saw so much more in us than we saw in ourselves. He was our biggest cheerleader - always sending that encouraging text, recommending the latest educational opportunity, or ready to support your idea for some “good trouble.”
He loved and lived purposefully in his service to others. Q tirelessly advocated for youth, for women, and for people of color—those so often marginalized in our communities and forgotten in our lawmaking.
As Maya Angelou said: “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Q made everyone feel loved. He loved his wife, his mother, his friends, his constituents, his fellow elected officials, and his state and he was fearless about showing it each and every day. His love - vulnerable, joyful and limitless - is what we must rely on in these toughest of times to continue to light the way.
1/8/23
Andrea (Wilson) McCoy
I worked at Oddfellows in the early 2000’s and became a part of what I affectionately called “The Bobbye Posse” at the time. Of course, that meant I also inherited ties to the other wonderful humans Bobbye had collected along the way and Q was one of the greats. I moved to Boston in 2008 and Q and I fell out of touch and rarely saw one another in the intervening years. Despite that, though, I will always remember how open and genuine he was. The two stories that I remember most fondly are when I convinced him to join me and some friends at Illusions, a country line dancing bar in Wolcott, CT. The place was exactly what you are picturing and we all stuck out like sore thumbs. Despite that, we could not have had a better time and Q’s willingness to try and do and experience new things was a huge part of why. Q also came to visit me in Boston one after I moved. Somehow, I convinced him to try sushi for the first time. I suggested he try a California roll (because - first timer) and some sort of cream cheese situation. He hated the cream cheese one so much! He never let me live that down.
1/8/23
Ari Kubie
I met Q at the inaugural Geeks and Nerds Summer Gala at the Stamford Innovation Center in 2014. He was handing out pencils and talking passionately about education. I was a teacher. We talked for around 40 minutes about equity in schools, and discovered we were born a mere three months apart. His sincerity and intelligence dazzled me, and I followed his career form afar ever since. I always smiled when I voted for him. It was the only political mailer I was excited to see in my box. I knew he was going to be someone special on a national level. It's a deep injustice to all of Middletown, especially to the Black progressive community, that Q was taken from us.
1/8/23
Jackie Connolly Paton
I met Q and Carissa during the rehearsal for Theresa and Glenn’s wedding as one of their bridesmaids. Immediately his shining aura and positive energy illuminated the whole weekend. His smile and laugh were contagious. He and Carissa are such genuine souls that when they talked to you, you felt that they really listened and wanted to get to know you. I followed both for years on social media and was always so glad to see vacations, celebrations and achievements. Knowing that one of the good guys was elected to makes changes at the local level gave me hope on darker days. My love to Carissa and his family.
1/7/23
Verna boyce
Remembering Q coming to church for service looking down and he has flip flops on! Made me laugh! My comment to him “dude?” He looked back at me “what?” What was the problem with a suit and flip flops? Absolutely nothing Q!😂🩴
1/7/23
Lynne Salley
Where do I begin ? My child Janiah attended Stamford Charter school & she was having a tough time adjusting to the school which caused her problems but one thing about Mr. Q he was always there and a great part of her support system. She wouldn’t have lasted as long as she did without him. He was always for a change and anything positive. We will remember his smile & great personality. Even after leaving the school he stayed in touch through e-mail to check up on Janiah here & there . Somebody who loved what they did & wasn’t in it for the money !! This is a tough loss. Rest in Peace Mr Q & thank you for everything !
1/7/23
Caroline Beltre
I first met Q when I joined EquityCT. I loved his enthusiasm and passion. I especially loved his vibrant smile that could light up any room. He made everyone at the table feel included, accepted and seen.
His legacy will live on forever through the work we continue on his behalf. Let’s make him proud.
1/7/23
Andrea Reska
Q was my very first friend in life, we were about 3-4 yrs old. We lived next door to each other in Woodbury Circle. We played together everyday and we’ were inseparable. Even at a young age, Q had that big smile and caring demeanor that followed him through life. He had and still has a bigger then life personality. My mom and I ended up moving out of the circle and Q and I lost touch. About 15 years later when I was working at peds he came in with a patient, we both looked at each other and said WHAT!?!? Lol We literally picked up where we left off all those years ago. We were trying to make up for lost time and tried catching up, I even got in trouble that day at work, because Q and I were just talking. After 15 years he never changed who he was! That big ole smile, the laugh to get you laughing, his kindness and huge heart. Even though we lost time, I will never ever forget his smile, that smile will stick with me forever
1/7/23
Shelby
I never got the pleasure to meet Q. I was lucky enough to watch him through pictures and articles. For me, Q was the guy whose smile lit up a room. He gave my sister a sparkle in her eyes that always made me proud to know she was with someone who made her so happy and safe. I followed his campaigns and saw he was a man of his word, more importantly, he was the voice of the people. He was thoughtful and very inclusive to all. He was a man of the people. A family man who put his heart and soul into everything he did. He touched many lives. Even though I never met him his voice has touched me and impacted my life in positive ways. I wish nothing but peace for his soul and family.
1/7/23
Dolly Haddad
I don’t have some really big story about Q, just a lot of little ones that will always stay with me and remind me of him. Q was the most genuine person that I have ever met. I was terrified of knocking on doors, but because I knew him and could describe the type of person he was I was able to overcome that. He was so easy to talk up, because he just really was so amazing. Like many, I love his laugh, his fashion sense, and his over the top personality. But one of my favorite things about Q and the most memories I have of him was his not-so-secret nerdy love of board games. When he brought over his $300+ Kickstarter game (Rising Sun, I think?), and got so excited spreading it out over the large table. Pretty sure he kicked our butts that night. When we played Battlestar Galactica and he was maybe the worst Cylon to go down in the history of that game…he would tell it differently though. Our murder mystery night where Carrissa and him came all dressed up and we enjoyed our New Orleans theme. He was just so freaking fun and I will miss his brightness and his energy so much. And that beautiful, beautiful smile.
1/7/23
Jordyn Wilson
I worked very closely with Q and his office to put on a Middletown Community Vision Session alongside our friends at CTJA. He was very eager to hear from his constituents and young people regarding the repurposing of the Connecticut Juvenile Training School. He was very passionate about making sure that facility never reopened, & that youth, families & communities had the investments & supports they needed to thrive. I remember in a planning meeting thinking to myself “there’s no way this legislator is this funny” but he was so much more than the titles he held. Q was down to earth & authentic in everything he did. I will truly miss his personality, smile and laugh.
1/7/23
Erika Muzik
Q volunteered yearly at Middletown High Schools Project Graduation. I distinctly remember seeing his bright smiling face and hearing his laugh from the down the hall when I arrived to Project Graduation my senior year. He was tasked with asking the students trivia questions in exchange for the opportunity to win prizes. My friends and I were instantly drawn to his infectious laugh and amazing stories! He had us all in the palm of his hand, before we knew it we had talked to him for almost 45 minutes! He had us laughing so hard with the questions he was asking and stories he was telling! My friends not recognizing him as a parent or teacher asked him who he was towards the end of our conversation. He explained who he was and that he was actually an alumni of MHS. He told us that he loved project graduation when he was in high school and it meant a lot to him so he decided to come back and help out! He showed us the importance of giving back to a community and cause that gave to you. As a freshly graduated senior this was the last thing on my mind, I was so busy looking ahead to where I was going away to for college and everything that had to offer but his story still sticks with me today. I was born and raised here in Middletown and he has acted as such a role model to me and many other young people in this community. His dedication to our city and giving back to what mattered most to him is a message I will carry with me for the rest of our life. Q taught us how to grow our community and that’s by supporting the very causes that supported you. His life’s work and legacy will live on through us who have been and will continue to be inspired by his selflessness and dedication to doing what’s right and what’s good in your community.
1/7/23
Brenda Rivera
A couple of years ago I brought my kids to a community garden party on the North Side of Middletown were I reside. This was when our Mayor of Middletown was encouraging votes and as it happens he'd campaign team attended the Garden party. I remember Mr Quincy walking straight up to Garden and instead of gravitating to another fellow politicians he came straight to us single mothers. For at least half hour he shared he's ideas for the community and asked if there's anything he can do to help . Chook me to my core because I never met a more humble a more loving friendly man that had so much love for this community or any community. He's sincerity and energy was unique to look up to.
I always remember that day and always voted for him because he was one of the realest. RIP Mr.Quincy 🥀 always will be remembered
1/7/23
Rebecca Burton
Carrissa, when I came to the grand opening of your practice, I was so happy to finally meet Q. He was exactly as I imagined him to be, and I felt like I already knew him through you - he was immensely big hearted and dynamic, and so kind. He was standing by with such pride in his eyes, and a huge smile and warm, welcoming handshake for everyone who was there to celebrate your accomplishments. I sensed such awe in how he looked at you, and loved how he took a step back in order to watch you shine. The love between the two of you was so sweetly and so powerfully evident.
1/7/23
Alison Johnson
In February of last year, I was struck by his remarks on Opening Day at the legislature about his name change. I was so moved by the power of his words and experience - I chose to honor him at that time by reflecting his words back to him in the form of a small poem. I emailed it to him, and he called me shortly thereafter with his characteristic warm thanks. I'll never forget that conversation.
I was at a writing residency in Tennessee when I heard this tragic news. I read this poem for an audience of about 50 artists and writers, sharing the story behind it, and my great admiration for Q so that others would know of his life, work, and love of the Middletown community.
With the exception of the title of the poem, and the last line, all the words are his.
Representative Williams, for What Purpose Do You Rise?
In the spirit of camaraderie
to all of those in the community
who know that their name is not right, and know that it can be changed
so that they can be who they truly are
how powerful
something as simple
as a name can be
when you hear your name
and it doesn’t quite fit
it’s wrong
how important
home is
honoring the parent
who really took care
Queen Williams - mother to Quentin
Rise, Mr. Williams, Rise
Composed by Alison Johnson, February 13, 2022
(Also attached as a PDF to preserve the original spacing)
1/7/23
Hilary Cooper
I glanced around the hotel lobby looking for my new classmates this summer. Q could not be missed. He walked confidently across the lobby in a bad ass pink sweatsuit. I immediately wanted to know him. He was like a magnet. Q will continue to be one of the most genuine humans I have known. We only spent a month together, surrounded by many knowledgeable, passionate & fun colleagues dedicated to public service, but Q’s light was spectacularly bold and bright in a room full of light. I recently lost a friend who skied to her death off the top of one of the tallest peaks on the planet. We made hats with the word BRAVE across the front to honor her. Q was so BRAVE in his tireless advocacy for diversity and equity and truth. I wear the hat when I feel vulnerable. I will now have Q with me too when I wear it. He will be standing beside me when I do the public work that often makes us a target of those in fear. He will be there helping me seek the TRUTH. And someday these tears will turn to laughter as I cherish the brief but memorable time we spent together. Deep love to the friends, colleagues and especially family that he left behind.
1/7/23
Andreea Mierny
I met Quentin over 10 years ago on my first date with Damian where he proudly introduced us “this is my best friend”! And I knew how much they meant to each other right away. I respected Q from the beginning and soon loved him for his amazing smile, infectious laughter, funny jokes, for always calling me “little sis”, for making fun of my small boobs and my accent hahaha!
I have all these great memories and I’m sorry that I’m having a hard time putting them in writing. I still remember how excited he was about you, Carrissa, when you guys came to FL for the first time. He was keep saying “she’s the one, I just know it”! And he was clearly so right!
Last time I talked to him was around Christmas time when he was on the phone with Damian and I told him his chicken wings were still the best I ever had, he had a big laugh! Maya will always remember wujek Q and the high 5 he taught her (she still does it all the time) and we will always talk about him to the little ones as well.
Q was definitely one of a kind…I miss him dearly already. We’re both hurting, but Damian’s pain is something that I never saw him experiencing before. He lost his best friend and he will never be the same.
We will cherish Q’s memory forever and we will always have so many great and fun memories to talk about! I’m so lucky I got to spend time with him, to laugh with him, to be a little part of his life!
1/7/23
David Sandler
Most people don't interact with their reps, but i did have a few occasions and they were terrific. As a gig worker, I never had to navigate the unemployment labyrinth, but with the pandemic, i did. I contacted Q for help and after multiple emails, he helped me get my bennies. Q held "open houses" in town and i went to speak with him at Perkatory, hoping to get mylar balloons banned. Maybe not the biggest issue, but a big concern to me as an outdoor enthusiast. It was short pleasant conversation. I will miss him
1/7/23
TeeJay
I remember my senior year of high school which was the fall of 2021, and we were at the barbershop and Q was there. He was asking me about football, what was next for me after high school. And then he started talking about how he really is in the gym more than me at the time lol. And he said with his chest pushed out “back in high school it wasn’t no Quentin or no Q, I was on the periodic table. They called me Quintonium.” And the whole barbershop was laughing. And probably about 3 months ago he was helping me out with an internship for the summer of 2023. His mind and heart was always in the right place thinking about others. We love you and miss you Quintonium. Rest in Power.🙏🏾💔
1/7/23
Liam Conneally
I met Q at the 2022 HKS State and Local Government Programme. A clever and witty character Q looked for the good in everyone. My sincere condolences to his family, friends and work colleagues. May he RIP.
1/7/23
Aaron Schrag
Carrissa… I know it has been sometime since Qs first campaign but I will never forget the enthusiasm, strength, and dedication he had when he decided to run for State Rep. I feel so honored that I was able to be a small part of that campaign. The memory that I have is twofold. The first piece of the memory was Q arguing with me about how he wanted to be the state rep who raised his campaign funds the fastest ever. You might not remember but I joked with him about how incredibly hard it was to do that and if he wanted to do it, he had to have a very strategic and sound strategy about announcing and then raising the money. I’m sure this is nothing new, but for me it was because I had to eat my words when he raised that money in like 24 hours . And as I’m writing this to you now I have a big smile on my face because that’s how he did everything. He was determined to leave his mark and to make a difference. The other memory, which I would include a photo of as a text message conversation between him, and I where I ask him to give me a few bullet points for his walk hard. You’ll notice that what he sent me is him trying to save the entire world in one walkcard. And I remember I think I had to call him and say “Q, you can’t put all that on one walkcard, I know you want to save the world, but nobody’s gonna read that if you have 1000 things on it”. But that was him. He wanted to make a difference and make it now.
I have one other memory which you probably don’t know but my mom used to work in Hartford and she was actually a state rep in the late 80s and early 90s. After that she worked for an agency for the next 20 to 30 years. She has retired recently, but she did get to meet Q in his first term. So she knew that I had helped him on his campaign and decided to introduce herself to him during his first session. She told me that big cheesy smile immediately showed, and in true Q form said “oh your Aaron’s mom” and followed that with a joke and his patented laugh.
Carrissa, I only knew Q for a short while, but the impression he left on me will last a lifetime. I am so sorry for your loss and just know that my thoughts and prayers are with you.
1/7/23
Karen “KK” Williams
Quentin was my baby (youngest) 1st cousin. I loved him and he loved me from 11/24/1983 (Thanksgiving surprise) to 1/5/2023. That is my my cherished memory. Here he is with Terence at his first campaign stop. ☺️
1/7/23
Rosetta Langlois
Remember him as a toddler visiting my sister’s cookout in Middlefield. He was bright, articulate, happy, building things with hia toys. The bright eyes and wide smile were his trademarks then and now. My sister, Marie Langlois Jassy, was Aunt Marie and loved him and his mom dearly. She was proud of his drive, accomplishments, and humility… He was proud of her as well. Sleep on sweet ones, until we meet again😇🙏🏾💕
1/7/23
Kristin Mabrouk
I met Q when he volunteered to be a speaker at Youth Services Bureau Day at the State Capitol in 2019. He was so excited to share what it was like being a young person in state government and talk to youth about his experience getting involved in politics and how they could too. His enthusiasm was genuine and palpable. His presence in our state will be very missed but I’m also very sure it will continue to be felt.
1/7/23
Rep. Park Cannon
He visited Atlanta and was invited to an LGBTQ+ Bar (the longest running lesbian bar in the Southeast). He eagerly said he would come by and did! We had a really fun time and he was surprised at how welcoming the business was and how diverse the crowd appeared.
Another memory:
He told me how proud he was of me for knocking on the door of the governor as a voter suppression bill was being signed.
1/7/23
Camille Spaulding
I met Q when he came over to our REACH prep Program about 7 years ago. We clicked immediately. His smile was infectious. He was a ray of light with his great sense of humor. We remained in contact always sharing stories of education possibilities for the students of CT. He would often send me a text or email to stay in touch. This is a huge loss for so many. I send my love to his dear wife.
1/7/23
Jay
I reached out to q a couple of years ago about a labor issue. He stepped right in and took care of it. Amazing person.
1/7/23
Nick Lebron
Q and I had a running joke that we had to “check in” when I came to Middletown and he came to Hartford.
1/7/23
Meredith Bowen
I first met Q outside of Bielefield School on Election Day when he was running for his first term. It was a quick handshake and I assured him I was voting blue across the board and moved on.
A few months later we crossed paths again at the soft opening of the Whey Stationary restaurant on Main Street. It was crowded and he and Carrissa were sat with myself and friends at the large back table. Without a beat we all picked up conversation like we had known each other for ages.
After a bit, Q looks at me and goes “I remember you!! The blue voter at Bielefield! Did you actually vote for me?” I assured him I did. (I actually did.)
Every time I saw him out in Middletown after he always enthusiastically greeted me and we would discuss the gossip on any new restaurant openings. He was also the first to offer his thoughts on the next Nintendo Switch game I should buy.
While our interactions were small, his impact on me and the community was not. His constituents were never just handshakes and votes. They were real people worth getting to know. I won’t forget that.
1/7/23
Darryl Baukman
I still can’t believe this has happened. I feel like Whitney and I were just talking about meeting up with you to play more games and learn the new ones you have found. The memories I want to share echo what I heard a lot of people saying about Q during the vigil.
I remember one night early in my relationship with Whitney. I was with a couple friends at Mohegan Sun. Whitney said she was going to be there as well with her sister and cousin she wanted me to meet. So of course once I got the text I head into the casino bathroom check myself in the mirror make sure I’m not looking crazy to meet the family for the first time. As I’m checking a dude walks up to me says “looking sharp brother I love it!” I look over dude is way sharper than me has the loafers on no socks with the 7/8 pants got some ankle showing. He had a button up and a blazer on too!! Dude looked like he stepped out after a GQ photo shoot. So I said “Ay I’m trying to get like you brother!!” Dude just laughs and walks out. Nothing like when somebody you feel can dress gives you a compliment on how you’re dressed. So now I’m feeling myself thinking let me hurry up and find Whitney and her family before this feeling wears off. She was on the dance floor of course over at this place called Mist I believe. So, I strut on over ready to break out my bag of dance moves. When I see her I greet her and her sister Rena who I had met before and Whitney says this is my cousin Q and standing there with a huge smile on his face is GQ dude from the bathroom!! So we hit it off immediately! Whitney looks all confused because we greet each other like we know each other. In my mind this was my long lost friend I walked over here with a new and improved strut because of this guy! So, now it’s time to go into the bag of dance moves. There’s about 7 or 8 moves in there that can last atleast an hr. Little did I know I showed up ill equipped. Not only did Q also bring his bag of moves. He brought multiple bags like 4 Louis duffle bags worth and he knew the words to every song that came on! I was probably 23 or 24 at the time so, I felt like I was in pretty good shape. What felt like 4 hrs later my guy Q is still jumping and belting out these lyrics like we just got there. At this point I’m dog tired and that night I learned 3 things about Q.
1. He was all about empowering people and making them feel included.
2. He was a blast to be around and genuinely lived life to the fullest.
3. He was not to be toyed with on the dance floor. Never again will I challenge a Jamaican to a dance off. (I’m pretty sure he didn’t even see it as a dance off he was just having fun lol) I saw it as a dance off and I admit I lost.
I have many memories of how great of a person he was. I will miss him! Carrissa and Aunt Bea we are here for you please don’t hesitate to reach out. SIP Q I love you.
1/7/23
EG Salon Ellie Gagnon / Georgi Moskey Marino
We opened our business in 2010 in downtown Middletown and Q was one of the first people to stop in to congratulate us!
He popped in often just to say hello and check to see if we needed anything and how things were going .
When we started the goPINK Project , he was one of the first people to Jump onboard and get a PINK RIBBON etched into his head and dyed pink. He was so excited , yet a little nervous to think about what people at work would say, but he did it anyway . He was clearly excited to participate in the event that was benefiting the community .
Time went on and he returned to the salon shortly after meeting Carissa and told us all about the love he found from Missouri ! He couldn’t wait for us to meet her ! He was Beaming , more than usual.
We were lucky enough to have the honor to work with Carissa and Q to get Photo ready with hair and Makeup to photograph part of their love story around town and on the Rooftop of the Community Health Center!
We are honored and blessed to be part of this amazing Love Story of Carissa and Q. Although the physical part of Q is gone, his love for Carissa and each person he met will carry on in all of us. We are blessed and incredibly lucky to have known Q and all of his goodness .
1/7/23
Mary Kraeer
I remember that Q was the light of his mother's life. I surmise that he was a lot like his Mom. She was beyond kind and loving. She took me under her wing as a new nurse at CVH. She came to help me whenever I needed her, which back then was often. I feel so sorry for her loss which is beyond measure. I will continue to pray for her and Q's entire family. May he RIP!
1/7/23
Ellen and Michael
When the unemployment for the self employed covid aid first started, it was a mess to wade through. We contacted Q and he was so kind and so helpful. He offered much assistance and helped us navigate through the website and got us the answers we needed. We voted for him all three times because we believed in what he stood for. He was a leader and a good man. He will be missed.
1/7/23
Jessica (Spaman) Pattberg
About 12 years ago, I bartended at the Shadow Room on Main Street. Quentin would come in most Friday nights, flash his 1000 watt smile and pull up a stool to chat. We laughed, shared life stuff and just had the best time in each other’s company. Like everyone has attested to, Q was pure love. Happy, FUN, positive, full of life!
Being Middletown natives, we frequently ran into each other through the years. I loved his huge hugs and his genuine interest in how I was doing. How my family was doing.
My younger brother had the privilege of attending Woodrow Wilson middle school with Q. He were reminiscing last night about what a wonderful kid he was - always a firm handshake with a “how are you?” Genuine.
Quentin, you are loved beyond measure and will be sorely missed.
Love, “Spaman” as you still called me.
1/7/23
LaTeisha Mosquera
I will always remember your infectious smile!
1/7/23
Reverend Florentina Richardson
A lawmaker and a lawbreaker unfortunately died in that accident. The lawbreaker was heading the wrong way. Our beloved Lawmaker, Q Williams, who I have known for 14 years as an excellent leader, purposely lived his life with an incredible smile on a trajectory that always headed the right way!
1/7/23
Hilary Felton-Reid
Q, which I had finally gotten used to using about a year ago, has shared his smile and exuberance with me since our time as Bielefield Bobcats. As he did with everyone, he remained a loyal friend despite many years of not being in touch. When we reconnected as adults at the Capitol, he continued to use the nicknames he’d used when we were young, Valley Girl and Bobcat, and also sometimes, Sister, which instantly brought me back to simpler times. Regardless of whether we agreed on an issue or not, he treated me like family when working together because that history was more important to him than any potential disagreement on an issue. He will hold a special place in my heart, always. There are no words for this loss, and I extend my deepest condolences to Queen and Carissa Williams.
1/7/23
Felicia Goodwine
I met Quentin in the late 80’s. He became friends with my brother, which essentially meant I just gained a little brother! Quentin would come to our house regularly and my brother and Quentin would play with their Ninja Turtles and Legos for hours! Quentin would often ask if I wanted to play so on occasion I would join in on their fun. When Ms. Queen would work my mom would bring Quentin to church with us. Quentin will always have a very special place in my heart! I like to say I knew him before the world knew him as “Q”. That smile never disappeared. When I was a senior at MHS, he was a freshman, so I always made sure he was okay when I saw him. As we got older our paths continued to cross as we sat on boards and committees…MCSAAC, Oddfellows. We were in a play with youth services, we were both mentors. We celebrated each others accomplishments with messages and always a big hug when we saw each other. Quentin was special, his smile lit up every space he was in. His passion for people radiated in all that he did. He was a selfless kind man. An amazing beacon of Black excellence. I will miss him, I know his legacy will continue on. I am a better person for having known Quentin…
1/7/23
Anne Hughes
Our 2022 Election Victory text thread:
"Quentin Phipps:
LAnnedslide is your new nickname!!!
Bigups Rep
Anne Hughes:
You know it, Baby!!!
Back at ya! #What62%WinLooksLike
Let’s go get shit DONE!!!
Quentin Phipps:
You better be loud af about your win.
Cause I’m gonna be preaching for you
Anne Hughes:
Hell, Yeah!!!"
But it wasn't just the texts, or the breath-squeezing hugs, or the random phone calls, or the passionate arguments, or the direct conversations about racism, and how much of it do we get to keep, in this work of policymaking... it was the fierce love that pervaded, that endures, yet and still. Hell yeah, I'll go to your Kentucky Derby Alpha fraternity calling in party... hell yeah, I'll raise money for the House Dems, hell yeah, I'll endorse Kamala for President, hell yeah, I'll co-sponsor Every. Single. Bill. that promotes justice, and REAL equity, aging in place with dignity, lifts brown and black women and fam, renters rights, REAL affordable housing, STOPS Solitary Confinement and the dehumanization of our brothers and sisters... I did snag your Stop Solitary button that you placed on your desk in chamber....to remind us all to be your co-conspirators, but with Q-worthy megawatt smile, and loud, raucous joy... to continue your "WE" legacy.... your legacy of championing the whole damn team... to be loud AF about our purpose, our mission, to deliver real change for our beloved community. And if I really listen amidst my tears, I sure can hear you preaching for us... 'Bigups, Chair Q,Bigups.' Now let's get shit DONE.
1/6/23
Anthony Moran
I first met Q when he was running for City Treasurer in 2011. I was volunteering for the Drew Campaign and Q came into the Headquarters where he asked me if I was a Blue Dragon since I was entering my Freshman year at Middletown High School. After that our friendship blossomed and although I eventually became a Republican, I worked on Q's State Representative campaign when he ran for his first term. Shortly after he won, I called his office to talk about a piece of legislation that I wanted to be adopted by the General Assembly, he personally called me and we talked and laughed but Q was determined to assist me. I valued our friendship and I will really miss him.
1/6/23
Brett Braccidiferro
Oh how far that little candle throws its beam, so shines a good deed in a weary world
1/6/23
Tara Cook-Littman
Always a huge smile and full of joy and kindness, I know Q impacted everyone he met. While my interactions with Q were brief, they made a lasting impression on me, so much so, that in 2019 I wrote about one such interaction in my writing class. As an advocate in Hartford, Q always treated me with respect and kindness. I remembered the essay and pulled it out to share with Qs loved ones and colleagues who are filling my news feed with so much love, pain and joyful remembrance. My prayers are with all those mourning Q’s tragic loss. Here is what I wrote . . .
“I was standing by the rope where they section off lobbyists from where the legislators walk by to use the bathroom or to go to their caucus rooms. We stand at this rope calling out to legislators. It feels like the red carpet at the Oscars. Sometimes legislators will stop to chat, most just walk right by us. This time, a young, hip legislator approached me and said, "You have red paint on the bottom of your shoes." I smiled, but didn't reply right away as I assumed most legislators in Hartford would have no idea what Louboutin shoes from France were. He continued, "I had to come over and see who was wearing Louboutins!" Ok so he knows about Louboutins. I explained that I got them in Paris on a ten year anniversary trip with my husband. "So Louboutin," he named me, " what are you doing here today?" "I'm advocating on a bill to ban chlorpyrifos, a highly toxic, dangerous pesticide." Without a second of thought, he responded, "I'm on board! And what is your cell phone? I want to send you my contact information so we can talk about what else we can do on pesticides."
Q did indeed follow up with a text. He confirmed that he co-sponsored the chlorpyrifos bill and said, "thanks for keeping me on this." I am praying that his loved ones will be comforted and that his contagious positive energy will live on in those who knew him. May his memory be for a blessing.
1/6/23
Lisa Pinette
I have worked at Olin Library at Wesleyan since 2001. I first met Q when he worked as a summer student worker at the circulation desk at Olin Library for many years. He greeted everyone with his infectious smile and laugh. You just knew he was going to go places from the moment you met him.I believe I last saw Q in person several years at the wedding of Danielle Salafia where he officiated. I had the pleasure of being seated at the same table Q and to catch up on all the things he was up to. It was there that met Carissa and saw their love and admiration of each other up close. I was so excited for him when he entered the race and won his first election for State rep. Like everyone else in the community that he touched, I was so shocked and saddened that his life was tragically cut short. Sending love to all who loved him.
1/6/23
Patti Anne Vasia
Rejoiced with and for you when you celebrated your joining in marriage.
1/6/23
Regina Young
As a legislator, I met Q at a conference and we were instantly connected. I am a PA representative, but a native of CT. He was indeed a true blue stand-up guy. He helped me with so many of my friends and family members so when ever I was in CT., I always reached out. He will forever be missed. My condolences.
1/6/23
Bunmi Akinnusotu
Q was just a couple of years behind me at Bryant and have nothing but fond things to say about his presence and leadership. He smiled, was diplomatic and always willing to talk. I wish our Congress was filled with more people like him. My last conversation with Q was maybe 2019 and he offered to help my cousin look for work while she was enrolled at Bridgeport University. His giving spirit never left and I regret we never spoke again. May he sleep well.
1/6/23
Tami
Q was my very first program manager when I started my summer jobe with the Downtown Business District at age 14! He was always in touch and made certain that I continued my education in social work. He was a fantastic mentor who will be greatly missed and never forgotten. His laugh was always contagious xoxo I remember when he 1st learned how to do the “ Gangnam Style “ dance …he literally did it the entire day 😅 my sincere condolences to his wife and family. ♥️
1/6/23
Roxanna Usticke
I met Clarissa and Q in an elevator at either Falcon or Conncon. We started chatting and Q was so kind, happy, and vibrant that I looked for him at each subsequent convention and followed his life on FB. I played games with him at many conventions after the first and he always remembered me. He was such a joy to know and did such amazing work. The world has lost a wonderful human.
1/6/23
Taylor
I just saw Q last month at the WFP dinner. Even though he had had car trouble he still showed up and we had chatted a bit and he shared memories of growing up with an adult we both know. This photo is one I took at the BLM rally at the Capitol in 2020.
1/6/23
Anna Hailey
I haven’t known Q that long, but I remember him from his laugh. Which is probably obvious because he had a very unique one, as well as his smile, but the thing I noticed more about him was the way he treated Carrissa. He treated her like a queen, gave her everything that she deserved, and they built a great life together. He was a very good cook. Cooked some of the most delicious food I have ever tasted. I would definitely consider him a top chef. I believe he could’ve became the next president. He was very good with politics. Very good at what he did, and he’s very smart. I’ll always remember every time we saw each other he would always say “sup lil cuz” and I just went along with it because that was our thing. And it will always be our thing.
The photo is me at your guys wedding reception, and I’m wearing his jacket, it definitely doesn’t fit but it kept me warm throughout the night.
1/6/23
Rachel Koch
I can perfectly hear his laugh when I see any picture of him. His ability to completely command a room with his energy was amazing. But my best memory is our night out when we were in Reykjavik. Two moments: at that bar when those guys were taking pictures with him and I thought they had him confused for a famous person😅 and that living room-like club and seeing Carrissa and Q completely tear the dance floor apart when “these hoes ain’t loyal” came on. That’s a song I will always think of you two when it comes on. I don’t have a picture of that moment but found one from our dance party at the cabin in Iceland that I hope will suffice. Hard to imagine never seeing his smiling face again in person but I am so very grateful for the moments and memories we all had together.
1/6/23
Dustin Ingalls
I knew him online for years, but only met Q in person once. Yet he treated me like we were long-lost friends. Turns out that's how he treated everyone he met. It's a shame the world lost the opportunity to be his friend.
1/6/23
Melissa Duenas-Witter
One time in my early 20’s I was out celebrating Bobbye’s birthday (after a messy break up) and I had too much to drink. The night was winding down and people were heading home, but I wasn’t ok to drive yet.
Q sat with me on a curb after closing, sharing stories, making me laugh and fended off folks offering to take me home. He eventually drove me home in my car and had a friend follow in his car. He helped me to my apartment and waited at my door until he heard me lock it from the outside. He spent hours making sure I was safe and then for the next decade called me “Bobbye’s other drunk friend” instead of my name. Lol
I have lots of other stories of him helping people in my community through out the years and being utterly grateful for his ability to move mountains to get things done. His last message to me said, “The doc says a friend of yours needs some help. You never exploit our friendship enough. Call me.” I did. And of course he helped to impact their lives in such a momentous way as he did so many.
1/6/23
Tyron Harris
A great brother!
1/6/23
Jeremy Milton and Udayarka Karra
Q officiated our wedding. As a gay couple, it was important for us to find someone who shared our values and was open and supportive of how we wanted our ceremony. Q was recommended by a friend and the afternoon was perfect with his sense of humor, thoughtful words, and welcoming presence. He was a genuine, kind, thoughtful man and his death is a tragedy. Not only to those who knew him but for the entire Middletown community. He was poised to do even greater things for a community that he loved so much. Our heartfelt condolences go out to his family and loved ones.
1/6/23
Patrick Johnson
Q was my RA freshman year, one of the best RA’s you could ever ask for. I had the joy of getting to see him around campus for a couple years and I remember one time he was wearing this multi-colored jacket that just stood out, and he said something that always stuck with me. That in this world you need to be unafraid to be yourself, even if it makes people look.
Q was unapologetically authentic, and I am so lucky to have gotten to know him in college and then 15 years later reconnecting with him at an event with Representative Rosa DeLauro. He walked in and I knew exactly who he was and he recognized me after not seeing each other for so long. He smiled his trademark smile and yelled out “What’s up Bulldog!?” and give me a big handshake and a hug.
Q, thank you for inspiring me for years with your words and actions.
1/6/23
Erica
Oh my goodness, so many memories of his joy and laughter, my love! But one story keeps coming to mind...
When we were in Iceland and Q and Josh were hopping on rocks and get most of the way across that waterfall at Snuffaluffaguss. Josh says, "I think I could jump the rest of the way." You, me, and Rachel are convinced he is going to fall down the rest of the waterfall 😂 but Q believes in him!! "Ya know brother, I think you could too!" So Josh jumps and makes it! (With just one little pinky finger sacrificed!)
Q always believed in people. He had such hope for what could be done and accomplished. He had such a zest for life. He had more life in his own pinky finger than most people have in this whole world.
I am honored to have known this wonderful man you met, married, and made such an adventurous and joyful life with. I love you.
1/6/23
Noel Sullivan
Q gave me my first job. In 2012, when I was 13, I worked for him during the summer at the Middletown Downtown Business District. I feel lucky that I even got that experience with him. He inspired me and taught me a lot about having a positive attitude on life. I’ll always have his infectious laugh in my head, but I am so sad that I will never hear it again. Whenever I ran into him in middletown over the past decade, he remembered my name and he asked about my life. His energy would put me in a good mood for days after seeing him - even if I only saw him for a few minutes. Middletown has suffered a great loss. There truly are no words that can describe this tragedy properly. Sending love to his family and friends and everyone else who met him.
1/6/23
Ryan Hawley
Representative Ken Gucker introduced me to Q at the 2022 Democratic Convention. We were both waiting in that NEVER ENDING line and he had such an incredible energy to him. I introduced myself and he encouraged me to continue being involved and him and I exchanged contact info. He had the coolest way to do this - he just tapped my phone with his and BOOM there he was in my contacts. Rest easy Q. I’m glad to have met you and wish I had more time to learn from your experience in making Connecticut a better place for not only our current constituencies but for the future of our great state.
1/6/23
Av Harris
I 1st met Q in 2011 when he was Running for city treasure in Middletown. We were both working a phone bank when I was One of the Denise Merrill staff that was volunteering to also work the phone bank in Middletown. I distinctly remember Q's voice and his enthusiasm and the way he just commanded attention in the room. I was instantly drawn to him and we started a conversation that seemed to just continue for the next 12 years. Q Was brilliant and enthusiastic and a little crazy which suited me very well because I have always thought of myself as a little bit crazy and also enthusiastic too. I could not match his brilliance, but we talked about so many different public policy topics that were really important to Connecticut constituents like education, tax policy, funding for cities, public safety, economic development, and many others. He asked me for advice a lot about politics and we shared many good laughs over the years. He had a terrifically brilliant and biting sense of humor which also suited me very well. And you could hear him laugh through a very crowded cafeteria in the legislative office building in Hartford. When I was legislative and policy director for the city of Bridgeport, Q was a lobbyist representing the charter school in Stanford he worked so hard to support. And he would often tell me stories about the various things he had to do for the school children including feeding and cleaning them up. Q was never satisfied with the status quo, and told me early on his intention to run for state representative. I enthusiastically supported him and encouraged him to do it because we need more brilliant creative thinkers at the state capital in Hartford and I knew he was a hard worker. And as his campaign went on he started to encounter some turbulence running for the seat and we would share many stories about Primary and election battles that we had each been through. We got to share somewhat of an inside joke between just the 2 of us that every time we would see each other we would say to each other and then crack up laughing. And that expression was "nothing personal, just business." Every time we would see each other for the next few years as my work at the state capitol transitioned to be part of the Lamont administration for the department of public health, we would see each other frequently we would look at each other and say nothing personal, just business and crack up laughing. Nobody else was in on the joke. And that is the last memory I have of Q on election night November 2022. I saw him at the democrats campaign headquarters at The Hartford yard goats stadium. He looked at me, having not seen me for a couple of years through some very difficult times and he made a beeline for me. He had a huge smile on his face That could light up a room and he gave me the biggest bear hug I can remember receiving in the last few years. And he looked at me in the eye and he said nothing personal, just business and we cracked up laughing. That is the last memory I have of Q and I will never forget it. He was one in a million and his loss Is a gaping hole for all of us.
1/6/23
Colmon Elridge
When I met Q, I was brand new to the Young Democrats of America. In running for Vice President, I had to quickly learn everything and everyone and Q was one of those who saw my fear and my potential and took it upon himself to be a guiding light. I was older but he was the big brother. He made sure I always knew he had my back but demanded I always do what was right. It was easy to stay on the right track because I never wanted to disappoint him.
When I lost my race of President he called almost daily for months to check in. The days I didn’t get a call, I’d get a text or an email telling me to both keep my spirits up and to not let one setback define my destiny. “You are more than one race you win or lose”, he said. “You’re purpose is bigger than YDA. Hang your head and you’ll maybe miss your destiny. Eyes full ahead”.
I was so excited when he decided to run for office. He called to tell me and I think I signed up as a monthly donor while we were still on the phone.
One of my favorite memories is when Victoria and I came to meetings and usually had our very infant children, he’d make a line straight to them and they’d always giggle or smile. They knew even then he was just a good person. One time Colmon spit up on his shirt and when I went to grab him thinking Q would want to go clean it off or change he said, “unless it’s acid and I’m going to melt, I’m good.”
When I became Chairman of the Kentucky Democratic Party, no sooner had the press release gone out than I got a phone call from Q telling me how proud he was and figuring out ways we could have Connecticut and Kentucky work together. He told me that I made our ancestors proud. I reminded him that he did too. Little did we know just a little over two years later, he would be called to become one.
Q cared. He radiated God’s light and love. He was human and wouldn’t want to be erroneously memorialized, but for whatever his faults, of which I cannot really name, he embodied goodness. He was the kind of man I want to be, I hope my sons become, and hope my daughter marries.
1/6/23
Sheryl Dougherty
Que is one of a kind - I say that in present tense because he is and always will be.
Impeccably dressed, boisterous laugh and a smile that lit up rooms.
He was always ready to provide assistance and resources and to lend a hand all while empowering and equipping you to go out on your own to make change.
He was my go to call when I needed to advocate for anything, whether it be for the aged, in housing matters and most recently labor. I'll always keep his cell phone to remind me of his constant words to me: identify the root, engage the appropriate resources, and narrow down the solutions in a prioritized order to make the change. His guidance will be missed. His legacy permanent.
1/6/23
John Carlson
I first met Q when I was graduating high school, at the Middletown High School Project Grad event in 2018. He was a volunteer at the event, and spent a good portion of his time playing games and hanging out with us. My first introduction to Q - and to the entire world of politics (both in Middletown and in general) - was the most friendly, down-to-earth guy I could imagine.
As I started to get more involved in politics, both in Connecticut and in New York where I go to college I was able to meet and work with a lot of politicians, including Q, at this point now in office in the General Assembly. There wasn't a single person that was more prepared or took their job more seriously. At a recent DTC meeting Q came in (in person!) and shook hands with and introduced himself to every single person in attendance. What some might consider a politician's standard operating procedure was, to anybody that knew Q, his favorite part of his job. Getting to interact with the people of Middletown.
Q was everywhere, in Middletown and Connecticut as a whole. From MHS events, to political meetings, to anything happening in Middletown. During the day yesterday my Mom came over to me to show a picture of Q with a friend of hers, at her PhD defense 15+ years ago! Q was always there, always having the best time out of anybody present, always working to protect and improve the lives of those around him.
There is this rare type of person that has the capacity to be friends with absolutely anybody. Q is the textbook definition of this person. There is nobody that I would have rather had as my introduction to politics. Thank you for being such a role model to me and so many others, from Middletown and beyond.
1/6/23
Madison Holley
Q had a very great soul always had a smile on his face, he used to eat lunch with me and my brother in elementary school, and we had a mentor picnic and mine didn’t show up so he stayed with me the whole time, he always would come to kids corner and hang out with us he’s in a better place now to be even more happy may you rest in peace-Q
1/6/23
Audrey Salafia
I had the honor of working with Q at SCSE in Stamford. As a classroom teacher I was able to get to know him over the years. A few years back we got chatting and we learned that we only grew up 10 minutes apart. He was so